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I'm still here

Scream58Senior Contributor22 May 2022, 9:30 pm AEST

I'm still here

I've been having hassles with my log on but I'm hoping I've got it sorted now.

So ... election day yesterday and I worked at the Polling Booth. 13.5 hours!!

I'm totally wrecked today. My whole body hurts. I'm glad it's over. So many people. I think I filled my people quota for the rest of the year. My Dr didn't want me to do it but I need the money.

I've been napping all day today and still struggling to keep my eyes open. Hoping for a good sleep tonight.

27 replies

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In response to: I'm still here

Scream58Senior Contributor03 June 2022, 9:10 pm AEST

Re: I'm still here

My Facebook news feed is full of suicide prevention posts at the moment. 19 years too late. This hurts like hell.

In response to: Re: I'm still here

tymeModerator03 June 2022, 9:12 pm AEST

Re: I'm still here

I’m so sorry to hear @Scream58 .

I acknowledge how difficult this anniversary is for you.

Sitting with you.

Hugs, tyme

In response to: Re: I'm still here

Scream58Senior Contributor03 June 2022, 9:20 pm AEST

Re: I'm still here

@tyme

Tonight I am really wondering what I am fighting for.

I just wish I could cry.

In response to: Re: I'm still here

tymeModerator03 June 2022, 9:38 pm AEST

Re: I'm still here

Hugs @Scream58 .

I don’t have the answers for you, but know I’m listening and hearing you.

It is bleak and tough tonight. You may not feel you can do much right now to make yourself feel better, and that’s okay.

Take each moment as it comes.

In response to: Re: I'm still here

Scream58Senior Contributor31 July 2022, 3:34 pm AEST

Re: I'm still here

I don't even know why I'm still here.

My absense is because if I say what I feel my post will be rejected. That's okay though, I'm used to rejection. I've spent the past few weeks assessing/reassessing my life. I have "health care burnout". Tired of GPs, pathologists, radiologists, psychologists and every other "ist". I've decided to just go with the flow. If mother nature decides it's my time to go, I'm ok with it. I'm 64 years old and completely out of energy to fight.

Admin/ moderators if you decide not to approve this post I'm ok with that too!

In response to: Re: I'm still here

tymeModerator31 July 2022, 7:22 pm AEST

Re: I'm still here

Dear @Scream58 ,

I'm sorry to hear that things are so tough. Fighting can be tiring. Constantly fighting can be exhausting!

Sometimes, letting go to know that it's okay not to be okay might come as a refreshing for you.

Is there anything in particular you'd like to talk about?

tyme

In response to: Re: I'm still here

Scream58Senior Contributor06 Aug 2022, 9:51 pm AEST

Re: I'm still here

I ended up in emergency on Sunday night. Wasn't admitted and sent home on Monday. The hospital has made me an appointment with a psychiatrist on Wednesday. This is going to include a medication review.

I agonized over if I should tell my family about the episode and today I decided to tell them. Bad move! I got a long angry lecture from my son about how my actions affect everyone else. No sympathy, no understanding, just anger.

He suggested that whenever I feel down I should go stay with him or my other son. I told him I have to learn how to live my life without running away every time things get tough.

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