We do walk similar paths, life hasn’t been easy for me. After getting married at 21 to my husband who was 27 with an already failed marriage and one daughter behind him I thought I was ready. I didn’t know him for that long but was young and headstrong and despite my mum saying not to do it, in I went. We had three daughters in four years and for awhile life was okay. Then and it’s a long complicated story, aren’t they all, he cheated at 19 years of marriage came back after lying to me just before our 20 th anniversary and here we are at 31 years this year. I think we’ve probably been happy maybe 10 of these years. He yells drinks and lies. I was once strong and outspoken now I’m too tired, too scared and just can’t be bothered most of the time. I focus on other things in my life, my girls my grandsons my animals but feel like I’m drowning some days. He drinks and drives but never gets pulled up and I think how can he get away with this? Even though it would mean he couldn’t get to work and stuff I actually want him to be held accountable. He’s the only person I know that gets away with everything. He lies to his family who think he’s just fine, no one is interested in what I say so I’ve given up. What’s the point, you just end up looking like some desperate idiot. People say move out, so firstly our daughter, son in law and one grandson live here in our rented house while they build their home. I have no education, I look after my grandsons I have no money of my own and certainly not enough to run a home. Rentals aren’t even cheap anymore. It’s sad that women still live dependent on men and scared but it does happen. Thank you for the support and letting me know I’m not alone. This is my safe place, to say how I really feel without fear so it means a lot to me. No one will judge you here, only offer help. I just want to escape for awhile
