Relief from suffering

dont think the stages of greif exist .

it is just a Psycologists list.

BUT if it works for you use it.

I live by a simple rule .

Time dosn't take the pain away or heal . It simply makes it easier to mange and deal with.

I am 47 and lost my mother when i was 18.

Even now on occasion like my daughters upcomming 16 birthday I find i miss my mother acutley and painfully as she will never see how magnificent her grandchildren are.

sad yes but after the fact a happy sad and I am grateful for every breath i take be it sour or sweet blossoms in the summer breezes.

And that i owe to my Mother.

'T'control'

I'm sorry for your loss

I've experienced loss

But as in feeling my friends loss and hurt

As if it was my hurt

These days

!

Five females I have known who had an abortion

You can't understand how I can feel their loss

So deeply

So deeply

I feel their loss

As if it's my loss

I'm not the father of any of the children

No doctors textbook can explain people who experience

Great Deep Loss

No psychologist's degree can explain people who experience

Great Deep Loss

I hope this post is not too much

It's as if there's something wrong with me

It's as if men aren't allowed to show emotion

But aren't men human just like everyone else

I'm scared the Internet is like teaching to be like robots without emotion

Is the future like as is we're machines

And real emotion is too be punished

It's not too late for me

I hope it's not too late for you

But not every day is as sad as other days

Again

I fear for a future that is already happening

Are we robots or machines without real emotion

Are we robots or machines too be punished for showing emotion

No I'm not a robot

No I'm not a machine

And yes I have emotions

And yes I'm human

And no

I'm not afraid to show emotion

I'm getting scared

Dont know who's a friend

And

Who isn't a friend

Dont know who has an agenda

And

Who doesn't have an agenda

Dont know who's a user

And

Who isn't a user

I hope there's genuine help

Here

On 'SaneForums'

Sane and Insane

To

Talk about Insane Things

One thing I disliked most aboiut my illness. was the having to learn to trustmy self again.

Then i realised Hey everyone makes mistakes ..all the feelings i have are not from the illness. And all of the feelings belong to me ..

saw a great TED talk on SELF ESTEEM vs SELF COMPASSION. Thought it was all "new age Hippy crap for the first few minutes then it really clicked with me "

Now i trust myself , and through that have learnd to trust others as i believe in my own ablity to get that right ( most of the time )..

I dont know whether you mind me replying on "your" thread @Happyness. I do try to respect your point of view.

Most people dont like to witness or experience violence ... domestic ... public or private ... I dont ...

Sometimes there are cover-ups and sweeping of skeletons under the carpet ... which happened to me ... I have had too much grief to deal with @Happyness ... its unnatural in peace time to lose as many people as I have ... and have more "mature" family members "playing hard to get", telling me to "move on" and sentimentally joking about WWII 60 years ago. I knew it was how it was going to be at my mother's funeral and I was well behaved and let it be that way .. but now my experience is one of experiencing many VIOLATIONS .. physical and emotional. As far as I have seen ... there is nobody on the planet without an agenda.. we all have pain and some understanding of how it came to be.

I agree .. which is why I did a post about "the capacity to be alone".

Yes relationships are important and loyalty is important ... but it is better not to be addicted ... because then we are not aware of ourselves or the other person ... all we can do is try ... for mindfulness ... it seems a lifelong quest.

I have feelings about favourites, my weight and my sexuality too ... it is helpful we have some outlet to be candid.