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SmcSenior Contributor
Hey Peoples.
Thinking I might move on from my original thread. Given it's long since turned out that Older Daughter's diagnosis at that time was incorrect, and honestly, life as a carer is more complicated than just caring for her. "Holding the ends together" feels like a lot of what it is, so that'll do.
@Determined @Faith-and Hope @Shaz51 ... and might tag in others over time, but will start with you guys, cos' you're the "long haul" ones. xx
In response to: Holding the ends together
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
❤️ @Smc ……
In response to: Holding the ends together
DeterminedSenior Contributor
@Smc ❤ 🙏
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
Shaz51Senior Contributor
Hugs @Smc ❤️❤️❤️
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
SmcSenior Contributor
Ta @Shaz51 @Determined @Faith-and-Hope
News keeps coming. As of yesterday, Mum's in hospital... went in looking very much touch and go, but stabilised fairly quickly. They're talking about keeping her in for at least the weekend, maybe longer.
It's circumstances where I'd usually say "time for a trip up", but we've got the complication that we don't want to leave my sister to travel alone if there's a death. Because we were up there only a week ago while Dad was in hospital, she doesn't feel able to take more time off, particularly when there's no certainty about how long for. I'm not up to going there on my own, particularly not if it leads into a funeral and a longer than usual stay. I am ringing up to check on Mum regularly, and as part of the palliative care framework, the aged care home is giving me daily updates on Dad... so keeping in touch as much as possible.
Have had a tricky discussion with Older Daughter about whether she should come to the funeral/s. We wouldn't be in a state to offer her any significant support while there, plus she's still turning up at emergency way too often (mostly physical(?) things that should possibly be dealt with by a GP instead, occasionally SH) and that would really make things hard for us if it happened up there... and even the long train trip she'd need to take to get there would likely be beyond her coping levels. End conclusion is that she's probably better off finding ways to grieve privately at home.
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
DeterminedSenior Contributor
@Smc ❤️ 🙏
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
@Smc ❤️🙏 here too
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
SmcSenior Contributor
@Faith-and-Hope @Determined @Shaz51
Sooo... Dad is getting less responsive, can't swallow solids and so he's on liquids only. He's sleeping most of the time and doesn't appear to be in pain... but yeah, he's fading out.
And Mum's still in hospital, and confused/delirious a fair bit of the time. Mostly she seems to be "living out" every day or sometimes weird situations, but as far as I can tell, nothing too nasty or scary, so that's something. Today she was talking about needing to cook a nice meal for Dad. It's a long time since that was a possibility. But one thing that's always stuck in Dad's memory is that "Your Mum's a good cook". Sort of weird in a nice way that they've both been remembering the same thing?
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
Bittersweet days @Smc …. ❤️🌷💋
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
SmcSenior Contributor
Very apt description @Faith-and-Hope. Yep.
In response to: Re: Holding the ends together
DeterminedSenior Contributor
Thoughts and prayers are with you and family at the moment @Smc 💔
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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