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Struggling

Struggling

Struggling at the moment.

I'm experiencing a combination of depression and anxiety bringing up all sorts of negative memories. Mistakes I made and opportunities I failed to take up.

It's making me feel unwell, jittery, hopeless, painfully uncomfortable and unable to rest.

I'm not even sure I will post this but at least it gives me something to focus on in the moment.

I know other people have real problems. When I look at my life objectively I feel like a fraud. I'm weak and lazy.

Like why can't I just start doing something meaningful to relieve the anxiety?

Every little thing seems too hard, too much for me to handle.

I'm overwhelmed.

I have so many excuses to NOT participate in everyday life.

Yes I have diagnoses but I also receive ongoing treatment for them.

I should be doing better.

350 replies

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In response to: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Your hugs and comments have been gratefully received my friend @Dimity

Take care,

RedHorse 🌹🐴

In response to: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Thankyou for your thoughtful response @Jynx

I actually feel a little bit better about the whole showering or lack of thing. You definitely get where I'm coming from with the painful aspects of the process. Add to that I live off grid and use an outdoor camping shower... Brrrrrrr

Both you and @Dimity reminded me that, however low I am feeling, I did have some accomplishments today.

Take care,

RedHorse 🌹🐴

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Aww you're welcome @RedHorse , it warms me to hear that it helped 💜

And whoooo boy, an outdoor camping shower sounds like an enormous challenge! My teeth are chattering just thinking about it!

Hope you can stay toasty this evening 🔥🤗

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Hello how are you going @RedHorse @perspective ? We've had several mild sunny days in a row and I've been trying to walk daily (4 days in a row now).

Hope ur OK.

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Oh hi @Dimity how are you going? Great that your walking. I’m struggling with my painting just no enthusiasm, Took my dog for a walk today on the way I gave the Vet $100 off my massive bill . I felt ok today …it’s kind of nice to feel ok. Hope your doing ok @RedHorse

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Glad to hear you're OK @perspective . Maybe it's just a temporary dry patch with your painting, like writers block. I'm pushing uphill atm, it's an effort but hey things could be worse. Hope you and doggo continue well. I let the cat in and out several times a day, he's in charge.

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Hello Forum Friends
@Dimity @perspective

Thanks for the tags and well wishes.

I haven't been well lately and only just checked in with the thread.

Today I got out of bed and went outside to sit in the sun - the first time for a while. It was lovely and well worth the effort. I even managed a couple of short walks to the dam and back.

I hope you are both doing okay with your fur family.

Take care,

RedHorse 🌹🐴

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Hello Forum Friends 🙋

@Dimity @perspective

Long time no post on this thread.

I'm sure it will come as no surprise that I am struggling again/still.

I hope you are doing better and life is moving forward smoothly.

I'm practising self compassion this evening and thought I'd pop in here to feel a bit more connected with the world.

I've told myself that tomorrow I will get up and participate in life, however small I will make an effort.

I hope you are doing okay.

Take care,

RedHorse 🌹🐴

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Howdy @RedHorse it's good to see you. Maybe it's a bit like treading water, it's an effort to keep afloat sometimes but it's great when you resurface.

How's your vegie patch faring after all the rain? I hope it's still productive. Here not much is growing and I need to finish the winter pruning.

Hope the weather is good for you when you venture out. I need to head for the regional shopping centre to try to find picturebooks for a young relative, maybe I'll get there tomorrow.

We muddle on.

Take care @RedHorse .

In response to: Re: Struggling

Re: Struggling

Hi @Dimity and thanks for your reply. Yes, we muddle along and hopefully end up farther up the road.

The sweet potatoes, citrus, tumeric and ginger somehow thrived through the rain and the hardy pumpkins continue to grow so I feel fortunate with the garden. It's still soggy outside but I'm hoping for more sunny days ahead both figuratively and literally.

I hope that your trip to the shopping centre is a success. I love gifting books to people of all ages, particularly the young.

Give your cat a pat from me (if he likes pats that is) and take care of yourself.

RedHorse 🌹🐴

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