FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

I was raped a little over 20 years ago now. It was by someone I knew and trusted and it occurred in my own home. I was physically injured, concussed, ashamed, afraid, embarrassed - all the usual things.

I never reported it to the authorities and never spoke to anyone about it. I had never been a particularly social person, but afterwards I isolated myself completely other than heading off to work dutifully each day.

After 18 years of almost constant battles with anxiety, flashbacks, nightmares, triggers, etc, I finally sought help from a psychologist. Initially it was for pain management as I suffered a severe back injury about 2 years after the rape. So after almost 2 years of occasional appointments I finally told her during a particularly difficult time (anniversary) what had happened all those years ago.

So early last year I was officially diagnosed with PTSD. On my clinical psychologists advice I have undergone a series of Exposure Therapy and CBT last year. It was a long, arduous and extremely difficult process. However, it did help to some degree.

However the nightmares, anxiety symptoms, etc continued. This was probably made worse as last year was an extremely difficult one for me all round. My little 11yo niece was killed in a car accident, my brother seriously and permanently injured, I was retrenched from my job when the business was sold, and I found out that my husband was cheating on me again. So I guess none of that helped.

And then on 29th February this year it was the 20th anniversary of my trauma. It seemed to hit me even harder than usual, I dont know why. There just seemed to be triggering events around every corner, it was awful. I struggled very badly.

My psychologist decided to try EMDR treatment once things settled down a bit. She felt it would help with the emotional content of my traumatic memories. So between April and early September this year, I have undergone 10 2xhour EMDR sessions. I am now on a break to see how things are now.

But in the meantime she wants me to talk to people about what happened, as it is an important part of the recovery process she says. However I find this really hard as I do not have any friends (my hubby is a narsissist according to my psychologist). I have become very isolated other than for my part-time work which I was lucky enough to find in January. I do some volunteer work in the aged care industry, which I enjoy. But I just do not have any friends I am able to talk to. My family live a long way away, and I could never tell them anyway.

Although I am still unable to verbally speak about the rape, I can now write about it, and even think about it to some extent, without bringing on a panic attack. So that's progress. I hope that by discussing it further and by learning how other people cope with their PTSD symptoms, I can further desensitise myself from my traumatic memories.

Hence my decision to try an online forum. I look forward to responses from other people who have had similar experiences to myself. I am definitely more of a listener than a talker, so I hope that I may be able to be of assistance to others here as well.

Thankyou for taking the time to read my story.

2344 replies

2,191 - 2,200 of 2,344

In response to: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

@Former-Member I was happy to read your description of the peaceful moments at the cafe overlooking the beach and watching the waves with your Chai latte. Am wishing for more moments of peace for you in your days ahead.

I really appreciate your thoughts on my overwhelm. Yes, I need to speak to someone, but I was waiting for the one month review. I am going to try to cut down my hours on the forums before then...I do feel bad though that posts go unanswered. I will still be meeting my CG obligations by cutting down my hours.

I haven't actually written about what's going on in my offline life - there isn't a thread I can tag you in (thank you for saying that). I was sharing little bits on my germophobe thread, just small daily stuff, but now there's no-one but me on there and I somehow haven't felt yet that I warranted tagging people there to ask them to support me, when everyone is going through such awful things. (I know what you will say to that 😄 )

I wasn't going to share any of this - see, you've drawn me out! I didn't mean to write all that, and on your thread, too. 😮 But perhaps I'll let it stand, as you've been kind. Thank you for your encouraging words, too.

I appreciate you listening and caring, @Former-Member . I was glad to read that things had been a little better the last couple of days for you. May it continue... I worry over your lack of sleep, and many other people's lack of sleep here, too. 😞 I hope that it can improve somehow.

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

hoe are you going? @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hey @NatureLover

We're all going through 'stuff' almost every day, and sometimes just by sharing it with others who 'get it' can be helpful and ease our minds a little.

And some days the last thing I want to talk about is what happening in my real life. But I might want company, or even to have someone sit with me in silence but know they are there.

That's the great thing about these forums. They can be whatever you want or need them to be, and you'll often find people are supportive and kind. Supporting others in the midst of our maelstrom often takes our mind off our own troubles.

In response to: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Good morning Sherry, I hope you are ok. Thanks for the tags. I will catch up on the replying to them later. Nikki. @Former-Member

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hi @Former-Member !

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)


@Sans911 wrote:
Hey @NatureLover
That's the great thing about these forums. They can be whatever you want or need them to be, and you'll often find people are supportive and kind. Supporting others in the midst of our maelstrom often takes our mind off our own troubles.

Thanks for your wisdom, @Sans911 . I appreciate it.

You're right, of course. Maybe I will start posting on my Germophobes thread a little (I know it's not really "my" thread). And I recognise that being able to support other people is a blessing. (I don't mean 'blessing' in a religious sense, but I'm not sure what secular word to use.) So therefore I should allow that blessing to happen for others.

Thanks again.

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hey @Former-Member how have you been hun?

In response to: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

A good morning cuppa for anyone who wants one.
I'm onto my second one.
Hoping the day goes well for everyone. 💖💖

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

@Pollyotter wrote:

Hello all.

Apologies for my absence in the past few days.

on the 19th it was 20 years ago that my father was murdered. Since then every year I get phone calls from family members bombarding me with questions about my feelings and so on. This normally leads to me having a bad birthday and shutting down from the world. Now that all of that is behind me for another year I can work on me again.

Again apologies.


Dear @Pollyotter ... absolutely no need to apologise for your absence. Although I was a bit worried because last time you were on, you were quite distressed.

Now I guess I can see why. Anniversaries are always hard, and the 20 year anniversary of your fathers murder would have hit probably harder than most. Its such a dreadful thing to have happened, and not something you really get over I suspect. You must have been pretty young when this happened.

Its nice that you get calls from your family members wanting to know how you're doing. It shows they care and are thinking about you. Have you ever told them how these phone calls affect you?

Birthday ... when was (or is) your birthday? Does our wonderful keeper of birthday data @Shaz51 know about your birthday I wonder. Actually it was the birthday of a friend of mine (the only friend I have really, but she lives 7 hours away from where I am) yesterday, the 20th. I sent her a birthday present last week ... one of the Diamond Paintings I did. She received it during the week and sounded thrilled with it. So that was nice.

I totally get that you shut down from the world during times such as the past few days. I tend to do that too when things are really bad. Although I'm trying to change that a little bit, and trying to keep from shutting down completely. I need support badly during such times, and I'm only hurting myself by closing myself off to everyone and everything. Although it does give a chance to reflect and rethink strategies for future.

I have a few sad and tragic anniversaries coming up soon too. On 23rd June it will be the 41st anniversary of the death of my first boyfriend. He died in a terrible car accident, not long after dropping me home after a day out together at the movies. He was only 23, I was 20 at the time. On 15th July, it will be one year since my dear Mum died. I still miss her so much. Then on 22nd August, it will be 5 years since the death of my 11yo niece in a freak car accident. Each of these anniversaries are going to be difficult. So I do understand, very well, how anniversaries hit so hard Pollyotter.

I'm glad that you can now start to concentrate on you again. Thats very important. Sending love and best wishes.

@eth @Maggie @Sans911 @outlander @Former-Member @NatureLover @Former-Member @Lee82 ... I'm not ignoring you. I realise I owe each of you a response to your posts to me yesterday and today. I had a bit of a rest day yesterday and a slow start to today. You are all in my mind however, and I will get back to you this afternoon. I just wanted to respond to Pollyotter while she was around. Its raining here now, and I just finished lunch. Hubby has gone for a post lunch snooze. And I think I will go and hide under a nice warm doona for a while now too. Catch you later.

Hi also to @Faith-and-Hope @Snowie @Former-Member @Eve7 @TAB @Bunniekins @Molliex @Adge @BlueBay @Owlunar etc

Sherry 🌺

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Morning @Former-Member 🌺

About to sort out some lunch for D2 and me.

2,191 - 2,200 of 2,344