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Living with Loneliness

Living with Loneliness

Feelings of loneliness occur when there is a mismatch between the amount of meaningful social connection we want and the amount we have. So while loneliness can be caused by isolation, it can also be felt when surrounded by people, and in friendships, family and intimate relationships. It is a personal feeling of social isolation

Loneliness can be really hard to manage and studies have shown it can lead to poorer physical and mental health. Physically, loneliness can cause low energy, poorer sleep, headaches, worse experience of physical pain and addiction. Mental health wise, it can cause anxiety, depression, poorer self esteem and thoughts of suicide. Often this can even lead to further isolation and feelings of loneliness for each person.

In Australia, 1 in 3 people report feeling lonely and socially isolated. This means that there is a chance many of us here on the forums experience loneliness, especially given that many of us have or care for those with lived experience of complex mental health concerns. It’s important for us to share that experience and find connection and support.

Questions for the community:

  1. What does loneliness look like for you?
  2. How does loneliness feel and how does it impact your wellbeing?
  3. Are the periods of the day or year when loneliness is harder to manage?
  4. What have you done to manage loneliness, do you have tips for others?

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We recognise that loneliness is experienced differently for everyone and we welcome all stories this space. Please remember to be safe and respectful of eachother, you can find the guidelines here. If you experience any distress whilst reading along with this discussion, please reach out to Lifeline 13 11 14 or the SANE Help Centre to speak to a counsellor.

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In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

I don't think I made myself clear ( again, I never do )

I just wrote a couple of letters to a member of parliament that a lady who lives here works hard for people who lives here and I think she should get her rent paid But teres 2 people who volunteer here who are trying to stop that.

Lets hope it happens but I'm too vulnerable to keep on writing letters .....

It's nice getting older.

It's been awesome reading everyone's posts

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Loneliness very painful, i had done so much to try and end it but can not make contact with others.
My biggest wish is companionship maybe there were opportunities but was to closed to open up. When i lose it i get very distressed.

I think became so isolated for a lifetime is that i can't reach out. initiating is always the hardest.

Best thing for me is health i say, it makes me feel worthy if i stay healthy. if i feel worthy i have at least a chance to open up.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@MissGremlin @lonemushroom @strawberry2 @cloudcore @tyme @Mooma1 @holdinghope5

@ENKELI @Glisten @avant-garde @tyme @Bunniekins

:It's definately a pain I resonate with. I'm experiencinge this today and yesterday and last week because my support has slipped a little bit.

For me that feeling of loneliness that feeling of unworthiness has always been in the forefront of my mind because I'm not loved by my mother.

There was a solitary---

no maternal instincts

For me all my life. It feels like a constant hole inside me. I could win lotto and it wouldn't fill it.

This last week, I'm getting emails after emails from Sane forums that I'm messing up confidential ility mistakes. Sane forums know me well, I'll get in a good place soon.

I need to cherish it. I need to set up my life where there is support or I fall very heavily.

The most difficult part - as I grow older - is that it's a wound that never heals. I will always feel unseen.

I just wanted you to know, that your not alone.

The biggest toughest battle is to find a place where your pain is understood.

I'll let you know I am here for you

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey @PeppyPatti, glad to hear that you are working towards being in a good place with your posting soon. It can be hard when you are contacted by moderators and we do so to support you to continue to engage with the community in a recovery oriented manner and within the Guidelines. So that the Forums are space where everyone can feel safe and able to share their experiences. Take care RiverSeal ❤️

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@PeppyPatti hey beautiful am here for you sweetheart. sorry you are going through so much pain. love you always bun xxx

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Dear @RiverSeal

Honestly truthfully, it makes me realise ( please all moderators only see the good in what I'm trying to write )

That how the forums changed for the better. .

Thankyou for putting up with me too.

@cloudcore @Bunniekins @strawberry2 @tyme @Ru-bee

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Pain, loneliness are indeed a deep ache. Sometimes I need to feel it on my own. Metabolise it in private. Listen to the pools of silence. To all struggling, many out there are doing the same in their own little satellites of silence.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

It's very nice to see you @Lila3

And @Till23 @Bunniekins @cloudcore @Bunniekins @RiverSeal @strawberry2

I'm re listening a pretty scary book for me. A wonderful author called Ursula LeGuin.

Wizard of Earth sea. Lonely Ged storming the seas alone.

Therapy means this - . It’s saying something to, or doing something for, another person to help them feel better or do better. ( David McPhee )

Is this what Sane Forums are doing ?

@Lila3 @cloudcore @Bunniekins @RiverSeal @strawberry2 @ENKELI @Glisten @tyme @Ru-bee @TAB

 

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@PeppyPatti Peps, @RiverSeal & @MissGremlin @Meowmy @tyme @Shaz51 @Oaktree always say the best supportive things.

Me - I’m not good at this stuff.

My friend of 38 years, Groomed as the family scapegoat, high achieving. Has a Degree. Worked with At Risk children for 30 years.

Can’t be still, to her own detriment. Doesn’t listen to her body.

Thinks the more you do, the better it is.

I’m the opposite. I am constantly in contact with my body.

I see life as interconnected layers and patterns. Synchronicity and serendipity. I follow my instincts.

Less is more. All of which is reflected in how I live, create and feel this world that I am part of.

“We are made of star stuff”. - Carl Sagan

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Thanks for sharing these deep reflections. I'm so traumatised I'm disconnected from body. I'm also highly academic. But I can be STILL. My sister is a busy, doer. She won't do the healing work. But in some ways she's inately more connected to her body. She lives in fantasy. I grind it out in reality. Neither is ideal.
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