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Living with Loneliness

Living with Loneliness

Feelings of loneliness occur when there is a mismatch between the amount of meaningful social connection we want and the amount we have. So while loneliness can be caused by isolation, it can also be felt when surrounded by people, and in friendships, family and intimate relationships. It is a personal feeling of social isolation

Loneliness can be really hard to manage and studies have shown it can lead to poorer physical and mental health. Physically, loneliness can cause low energy, poorer sleep, headaches, worse experience of physical pain and addiction. Mental health wise, it can cause anxiety, depression, poorer self esteem and thoughts of suicide. Often this can even lead to further isolation and feelings of loneliness for each person.

In Australia, 1 in 3 people report feeling lonely and socially isolated. This means that there is a chance many of us here on the forums experience loneliness, especially given that many of us have or care for those with lived experience of complex mental health concerns. It’s important for us to share that experience and find connection and support.

Questions for the community:

  1. What does loneliness look like for you?
  2. How does loneliness feel and how does it impact your wellbeing?
  3. Are the periods of the day or year when loneliness is harder to manage?
  4. What have you done to manage loneliness, do you have tips for others?

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We recognise that loneliness is experienced differently for everyone and we welcome all stories this space. Please remember to be safe and respectful of eachother, you can find the guidelines here. If you experience any distress whilst reading along with this discussion, please reach out to Lifeline 13 11 14 or the SANE Help Centre to speak to a counsellor.

834 replies

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In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hello my dear @Lila3 ,

Hope you are okay. So good to see you!

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey @Doldip15 !

I don't want you to feel lonely! Have you meat @Gemma13 ? @Gemma13 is @tonys book keeper, friend and confidant.

Despite tonys being unwell, they have sent Gemma to bring good tidings and especially named you.

You see? There are so many people who care about you.

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

I think I wrote a line of nonsense as I fell asleep sorry all! Tend to lose my conscious self and speak, think, write anything that isn’t real or is simply a jumble of my minds creation! Worse when you’re actually talking to someone- especially if that someone is your psychiatrist! Second worst was Paramedic! Sorry I can’t explain what i wrote as there is no meaning to that lost brain! Apologies again!
@Doldip15

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

You’re fine @Doldip15 no complain, never explain.I’ve certainly been there. Just go with your good self.

G

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Questions for the community:

How does loneliness feel and how does it impact your wellbeing?

- I feel inadequate and hopeless

Are the periods of the day or year when loneliness is harder to manage?

- When Im emotionally attacked by my wife

What have you done to manage loneliness, do you have tips for others?

- I just take it to the chin until life presents something

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Loneliness FEELS like nobody can possibly understand the challenges I've faced, & continue to face. It effects my mental state sometimes to the point where I'm afraid to leave the house, stand up for my wants/ needs, speak out about injustices. I often doubt myself.

I try to address my loliness via journaling, walking/ stroking my dog, chatting in SANE, having a cuppa with my neighbour.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Dear @MattFSX

Thankyou for writing in. It's nice to meet someone with honesty and integrity.

It feels like that with your answer/question formula.

My name is PeppiPatty. Yes I'm an ol' I love Peppermint Patty in Snoopy person.

Relationships can be tough can't they.

Are you able to write any positive for the day ??

 

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hi @MattFSX

Thanks for posting and reaching out.

I feel that when we do that - we open a little window of opportunity. I hope you get some benefit from some of the answers here.

To address your questions. Here's what it's like for me:

- Loneliness at times feels existential and brings up questions like "does anything really matter" & "what's the point of it all". Other times it actually feels okay. I mean, if this is all we've got, I can choose to get comfortable and move along best I can.

Loneliness, the feeling of, does impact my wellbeing. It's a feeling though it comes and goes. Just like the tides.

- I am often at my most lonely among people. Particularly if I feel we have nothing to share. At times. like that I go back to basics and look for the "humanity" that binds us all.

- As for tips. I breathe in and out. Focus on the present. Remind myself of what was is it like when I did not feel lonely and what contributed to feeling such way. I also use loneliness to spur me into action. What can I do to feel less lonely. I know that connection is important........I try to think of ideas that would help me connect to others. If all this does not help in the moment I go back to nature. A starry sky has many times given me the hope and perspective I needed when times were challenging.

I wonder if you reaching out in this Forum, is your way of kicking into gear and trying to understand this feeling a bit more.

Wish you the very best Matt.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@MattFSX 👋🏼 Matt you wrote “When Im emotionally attacked by my wife”.

Does that happen often?

G

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@Bon_courage Thank you for sharing!

Initially i thought it was part of the registration process.

I honestly dont know what my motives or expectations are. I was seeking for a coping techniques? Or maybe desperation to connect?

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