Hello @BlueBay
I am sorry that I was not here for you last night.
I am relieved to read that others were here for you though.
This is so helpful in these situations when there are people about later
who let you know that they hear you and are listening..
Bluebay you have many forum members who care about you and believe in you.
They all have reassured you if not now at other times that you are a wonderful person.
You are a loving mum and grandmother...
Not everyone has those qualities..
You have many qualities as the person you are.
I realise that at this moment you do not believe this. These are your feelings which are real for you. How you see yourself at the moment...Not how others see you.
Symptoms of your diagnosis might at times cause you to question what you have to offer.
This leads to my wanting to commend you on making an appointment with your therapist.
The best thing that you could do for yourself..seek qualified medical advice from someone who knows you in real life.
Taking that step takes strength...
Self awareness..a strong sign of knowledge about who you are and a desire to continue to learn and help yourself..
I think that the word intelligence is not a healthy word to use when it comes to discussing people like us who suffer with symptoms of varying diagnoses.
Intelligence is often used incorrectly these days reflecting on a person's level of education within a school, college, university.
It also gets confused with being sensible.
Some people can have several university degrees but not have common sense..
Some people with degrees also cannot hold a conversation with someone.
Some do not have the skill of listening....feeling compassion ...caring..
Some are only capable of thinking about themselves..
The true meaning of Intelligence actually covers far more than that.
It covers emotional intelligence...Life experience....Parental skills....People skills and much much more..
Self awareness....Common sense...Life skills...
Genuine intelligence is not about comparing one person to another ...
Life achievement is about learning about you as the unique person you are.
It is not about comparing yourself to others.
Keep on writing how you want to write...
Yes,,ask someone to explain what they mean.
This form of writing is so easily misunderstood by most of us.
Keep on being you Bluebay... Do not change you...
Ask the person to tell you in different words..
I struggle with this issue in real life.
Not with words...with communication...talking to people.
I am usually the quiet one...the one who listens.. I also have a very soft tone voice and am usually not heard over those with louder tones and of course in noisier environments these days...cafes..restaurants with wooden or tiled floors....chairs scraping...rooms therefore echo more..
If I do speak I am constantly interrupted...ignored because some people are too busy thinking about what they want to say and not listening.
I have been told that when I talk I say too much...I pause too often...I take too long.
That is because I think about what I want to say to that particular person.
So I feel for you as it hurts.
I ask many many questions...
Sometimes I just do not feel up to going to social outings because it is so draining and disheartening not being heard..
Feeling that you cannot write the same way as others is another form of not feeling heard..
Sorry about the essay again..
please be gentle and kind with yourself as you are valued and respected by so many people.
I listen to you and hear you and enjoy chatting with you
💜
