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I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor06 Oct 2021, 11:46 pm AEDT

I need to write

I need to write.

My anxiety is through the roof. It's the worst it's ever been. It feels like my chest is going to explode. I can feel it in my whole body, even in my legs. My whole body is reacting to something.

It's strongest in my heart/diaphragm area but it is also in my stomach. I have a slight stomach ache. It feels like my body is buzzing.

And I can feel my heart beating in my chest.

And my mouth is dry.

I feel sad that this is happening to me. I feel sad and alone.

I tried to write but that is all I could say.

42 replies

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In response to: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor12 Oct 2021, 2:16 pm AEDT

Re: I need to write

I did my meditation, I did my shopping, I went to the chemist and I have been eating healthy food.

I will take my Pug for a walk later. I'm going to make chilli beef now.

In response to: Re: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor12 Oct 2021, 11:32 pm AEDT

Re: I need to write

I did an hour of meditation (not in one go).

I ate healthy food all day.

I took my antidepressants.

My anxiety and depression aren't too bad but my stomach feels like it's tied up in knots. It feels like blocked emotions or stress.

I'm grateful for...

Night time and peace and quiet.

A house full of healthy food.

I'm going to listen to my audio book now The Body Keeps the Score.

In response to: Re: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor13 Oct 2021, 3:11 am AEDT

Re: I need to write

I woke up feeling cold and I couldn't get back to sleep so I have my hot water bottle under my feet and I'm having a cup of tea. I'm going to take some Valerian Forte and listen to a sleepcast on my Headspace app.

In response to: Re: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor13 Oct 2021, 7:50 am AEDT

Re: I need to write

I feel overwhelmed and I can't decide what to make with all the food in my fridge and pantry. I want to make something with salmon, avocado, beetroot, leafy salad mix, cherry tomatoes and red onion. I also want to use some wholemeal & seeds bread.

I also want to make banana and blueberry muffins and raw vegan chocolate balls.

Here are some ideas...

Cheesy salmon bake with brown rice and wholemeal rye breadcrumbs.

Sandwich with salmon, beetroot and leafy salad mix on wholemeal & seeds bread.

Avocado and basil pesto dip with nut & seed crackers.

Wholemeal & seeds toast with avocado on one slice and a poached egg on the other.

Small salad with avocado, beetroot, leafy salad mix, cherry tomatoes and red onion to have with my chilli beef.

I think today for lunch I will have wholemeal & seeds toast with avocado and a poached egg.

In response to: Re: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor13 Oct 2021, 11:24 am AEDT

Re: I need to write

I'm trying to arrange to pick up my bike tomorrow. I feel overwhelmed and just thinking about it is making me feel sick with anxiety.

The problem is I have to pay for a deposit for the hire car and pay for the balance of my bike, with the same card on the same day, and I'm confused about the transaction/daily limit*.

I have called my bank and I got a recording saying that someone will get back to me within 7 days! Jesus Christ, what is happening to the world?!

*I know that my card has a limit of $2,000 but I can't remember if that's for the transaction limit or the daily limit.

In response to: Re: I need to write

TideisTurningSenior Contributor13 Oct 2021, 1:17 pm AEDT

Re: I need to write

Hey @Arizona,

It sounds like there's been a lot going on for you. Overwehelm and anxiety seem like really understandable things to be feeling- I know I can get overwhelmed if there's a lot happening for me or around me and anxiety can spike in those situations too. You've mentioned experiencing a few frustrations recently around gnot really getting anywhere with the bank also, which I don't imagine would make things any easier.

You've mentioned before that writing things out is really helpful for you to release and express yourself, which is amazing, though I'm wondering if there's anything in particular you're hoping from the community in this space?

In response to: Re: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor15 Oct 2021, 5:56 pm AEDT

Re: I need to write

I'm confused. I'm not having a full post-traumatic attack but I am dissociating.

That's all I can say for now.

In response to: Re: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor15 Oct 2021, 6:28 pm AEDT

Re: I need to write

I changed my mind. I will come back.

In response to: Re: I need to write

ArizonaSenior Contributor15 Oct 2021, 6:44 pm AEDT

Re: I need to write

I changed my mind. I will come back.

In response to: Re: I need to write

Sandy-66Contributor15 Oct 2021, 7:51 pm AEDT

Re: I need to write

I’m just clarifying what you said about if I wanted to send a message to you directly I know your tag but where do I put the message
under what area. Just wanted to let you know I re did my story and posted it on Looking after Yourself

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