The end of my career, of life as I need it

Me too @petrichor and @ArraDreaming

Its not a romantic heart abut a courage heart.

I have studied hard and worked hard. Had a lot of jobs and professional roles. There is so much more to working than just the money, after we moved on from basic get through adolescent uni type casual jobs. Yes the mateship, and sense of aliveness, connectedness to fascinating individuals and organisations and usefulness. Yes every job has there difficult aspects, but a lot of people do not "choose" mental health issues to get out of work, which is one sad narrative out there.

Apple

Hi @petrichor .

I understand what your saying, but from the opposite end of the equation. I feel the emptiness of not having a job that gives my life meaning (i.e. through the workplace friendships, enjoyment of the work, pride in the accomplishments, ect., ect.); but I haven't yet had such a job.

I was told a long time ago to give up all hope. Maybe I have. I don't know...

I get the impression that you and I share a similar frustration with other peoples' dismissiveness towards the importance of those non-financial qualities of a fulfilling job. People who look at your life and think everything must be hunky-dory if you aren't bankrupt yet. IMHO, it's not fair. I wish the world would recognize lack of life fulfillment as just as dire a crisis as lack of financial security.

I miss parts of my job. I went on maternity leave and due to my marriage breakdown and becoming a single mum, I decided not to go back to it. My job was stressful, I didn't like that side of it, but for the most part I loved what I did. I loved the people that I worked with- most of whom have now moved on, I liked the clients I worked with and enjoyed seeing changes in their lives, that was always so rewarding. I think I lost apart of me when I left that place. Lost myself in becoming a Mum. I struggle to imagine going back to work now. I know that a time will eventually come where I will have to, but I have no idea what I will actually do.

Hi all,

thank you so much for your messages, for your understanding and for sharing your experience. I will write more tomorrow but I just want to thank you all!

have a good evening x

Hi

I have warn for hats than a politician with regards to my working life, this process was due to my 'head'.

The process to date has lost me continuity of work 'at one provider' but enhanced my still sets acroos the board and made me more resilient. You be fine just go and do it 'get a job' and move ON

I am sorry you lost your job @petrichor it is devastating, especially in a society and culture like Australia where there is very little community outside of work.

There's no such thing as secure work anymore. Even so called 'permanent' positions are easy to get rid of in the next departmental or corporate restructure, they can just restructure and make people redundant every 3 to 5 years or so. Australia has a huge proportion of casualised work, thank you John Howard.

I hope that you aren't renting and aren't mortgaged, I feel really sorry for people that are and are forced into retirement through redundancy. I have friends that were happy to retire in their 50s......but I think that is too early......just my opinion, but I have seen what not working has done to my own mental health and my family too. Its devastating, and hurts your confidence on every level. Corny

Thank you everyone for sharing your stories.

@petrichor , I hear the devastation in your post - the pain, the loss, the isolation. I also feel for you @ArraDreaming - working so hard, then losing it due to COVID. @Appleblossom , I totally agree with you when you said MH doesn't "choose".

I can only imagine how you are feeling @petrichor @ArraDreaming . I spend many hours of my waking like working, and that's because I love my job. I love getting out, the people, the challenges, the triumphs.... I'd be lost without work.

When I was in PARC (prevention and recovery centre), one key goal I developed as part of my recovery was to find people/friends/community OUTSIDE work. This is because when work 'fails', I'd have others to bounce off. As much as I love work, I'm reaching out to outhef communities just so I have a bit more balance in life. Particularly because I realised that when you hang around work people, you talk about work, and in a way, that's not really giving me a break from work.

Its difficult because I invest so much into my working life, but putting all my eggs in one basket may mean they all get cracked at once!

Im learning. We're all learning.

BPDSurvivor

Hi @petrichor

great topic to talk about -

In December 2019 I was made redundant by a new owner taking over our pharmacy where I worked. Four days before Christmas I was in hospital speaking to a CAT team member and as I was leaving I received a phone call from my then current supervisor. He told me that the new owners no longer wanted me to stay on the job. That news was devastating, i was so so emotional. I will never forget that day and how I reacted. Never had I before been unemployed. I thought at my age of 55 where would I now work. They pay me out and I was fortunate enough to stay home for 3 months and then look for employment. I ended up working in local supermarket but it was casual and they only gave me 7 hours of work a week. Not sustainable.

A friend of mine who works in pharmacy said to me that they were looking for someone. I applied and got the job in May this year. In the two and half months I was there I was sick 3 times, hospitalisation for diverticulitis; covid isolation and severe tonsilitis. The day I went back my boss (pharmacist/owner) called me and told me that he was not going to keep me on as I was taking too many days off! He said i was a good worker. I told him that it's not my fault that i got sick and i had medical certificates for all days. But it was easy for him to get rid of me because it was still in the 3 months probation period. Day after i was admitted to psych unit at hospital for 10 days as I was not coping.

Now I have been home for 7 weeks and I am lost; i have friends that i didn't work with. But they are all busy working so i find it very lonely at home.

I miss my friends at work, especially the pharmacy I worked in 2019. i worked there for almost 7 years and it was a small team but we laughed, we worked well as a team. it was great to go to work. That's what i miss.

Now - the thought of looking for work is very daunting, scary and overwhelming. My support team have told me to seriously take the rest of this year off to get better physically and mentally.