Let`s talk about Bipolar

You have a right to a life. Narcissm. Sadly often men let women do that work and it can turn sour for all concerned. Find a way, to meet your needs, pass on some of the burden to brothers and the state ...

Just want to say I'm hearing you @bipolarbunny and I'm sorry.

I wish I had something constructive to offer. You deserve a life, and a chance at happiness.

I was married to a narcissist for 18 years and it nearly killed me.

In the end he just up and left, after I had put up with so much for so long.

I'm so sorry you had to endure that @frog . I guess I've stayed alone my entire life because I was scared of ending up with someone like my family, but then I've ended up looking after my mother for the majority of my life keeping me in their toxic aura so it happened anyway.
People tell me to just leave, but they don't understand. It isn't easy to just leave a life you've had for so long even if it wasn't the best. Besides the financial hardship, if I left now I'd lose the house my father left me and for the sake of putting up with it a few more years, that's essentially my nest egg I'd be throwing away. Frankly being homeless terrifies me more than putting up with my toxic family a little longer. But I do know I need to get my bipolar under control. I've tried four different medications since February and nothing is keeping me stable enough. My tdoc suggested to me to go to the clinic for a term so they can find me effective meds in a safe and stable environment. It's hard to know what's what when my toxic family continually triggers my condition.
I live for the day I can finally be free of all of them. Sell the house and buy a nice unit somewhere quiet and go NC with all of them. Just that thought lifts my spirits slightly and helps me endure one more day.

BB 🐰💙

Hi BB🐰 @bipolarbunny sorry you are having such a hard time at home.

just wondering if you have a case manager or mental health nurse who could help you get your own home. You really do deserve to have your own life. There is only so much you should do for your mum or brothers. If she is no longer able to look after herself without you, then maybe going into care might be worth looking into. Sometimes we have to be cruel to be kind.
You are such a caring helpful person around this site and I am sure you could meet equally lovely people like yourself out there....helping in a volunteer position when you are feeling better. A way to meet new people.

Take care 🌺

@Bunniekins Oh my beautiful Pea, I'm so sorry you feel trapped too. It's just the worst feeling. Big bunny hugs xxx

And yes narcissists are just unbearable. They suck the life right out of you. I know that when I go to the clinic, it will be all about how dare I be so selfish to leave my mother and make my family look after her. They will be impossible to deal with when I get back. But I don't care. I deserve to have time out to look after myself. If they were any sort of family at all they would rally around and help me. By they are too self absorbed. So they can suck it up for a change and deal with her BS. My bucket is full.
BB 🐰💙

@bipolarbunnyBB you are so strong in dealing with all of this for so long. My narsisst died 20 years ago and it was a blessed relief. He was an alcoholic and made life a massive misery for the entire family. Made his own life miserable too for that matter .... I hear what you are saying about your nest egg just make sure you get the help you need for you like through the ndis. You must remain well and have time out as a carer. xxxx

Hi @Former-Member I don't have a case worker as such, but I just got accepted by NDIS and they have funded me a Psychosocial Recovery Coach. It's all a bit new and the recovery coach is new to the position but she works with my tdoc and we already have a rapport so I'm sure she could help me with something like that. My tdoc has already got me working on a plan b, it's thanks to him I learned about my mother's narcissism and the toxicity in our family. I had no idea what it was, I just knew I was always the outsider and the family joke. I never felt loved or wanted, was always bullied, yet felt compelled my entire life to win them over, thinking it was something wrong with me. Now I know it's them, it's left me feeling angry and bitter. So we are trying to work through that. It's just a complicated mess. If I won the lotto though, I'd be gone in a heartbeat!

BB 🐰💙

@Bunniekins Your new avatar reminds me of Baby Yoda, the mandalorian,

so cute. 🌺 I just can't think of one.

@bipolarbunny

@Former-Member Awww baby Yoda :D! It is pea in a woolly blanket to keep her warm in the winter months :D. Curtesy of @Zoe7 who always dresses the pea :)xxxx