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Alcoholic

Alcoholic

I am in the very beginning stages of detoxing from alcohol. I have had PTSD for 25 years due to a fatal car accident. I was exposed to the slow death of a loved one in the outback. I had 2 years of intensive therapy for the PTSD then stopped. I have been self medicating with alcohol ever since. It has become so much worse in the last few months. I am a single parent and yesterday my child found me in bed at 10.30 am drunk. I was drunk the night before and felt so bad and my hands were shaking so much I decided to have just 1 drink before my child woke up....that led to 1 whole bottle. What a terrible Mother. Dr again tomorrow and I will go to an AA meeting tomorrow night. So so lonely and ASHAMED GUILTY DISGUSTED

5 replies

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In response to: Alcoholic

Re: Alcoholic

Hi @Maizie, welcome to the forums. I'm Jynx, one of the moderators, just popping in to say that it's a really awesome step for you to be reaching out in this space. It sounds like a rough time for you, but also the fact that you're actively taking steps towards recovery is a huge thing, something you can be really hopeful about. Be gentle with yourself if you can, and know that we're here with you.

In response to: Alcoholic

Re: Alcoholic

I can't relate to what you're going through but I want you to know, as I'm sitting here on my couch, just joined this forum, I have my pain and you're not alone.

I hope you are okay and I wish you all the best.

In response to: Alcoholic

Re: Alcoholic

One thing I have to point out.. someone I know made a video addressing someone who thought they were not fit to be a mother, because they don't have the energy to play with their kids, and they don't love their kids "as much as" other people might.

She concluded, as the reality is, that you have no choice but to be a mother. Like there is no such thing as a terrible mother. You are doing as well as you can as a mother, because they see you as their mother. So please don't beat yourself up over the fact that you're struggling, or your kids are seeing you struggle. You make a huge difference in their lives anyway. There are people who never met their biological mother, but they still have a deep emotional connection to them.

That said, reaching out for help as you have is a great decision. I'll be honest with you, an AA meeting seems [...] terrifying to me, and I DON'T struggle with alcoholism, so you are being really brave!

I am sorry that you've been through so much, to bring about your condition. That's not your fault, but guess what. You can take ownership of your recovery. Once you manage your condition a bit better, you can brag about it, and say "I've done that, and no-one can take that away from me."

Your kids will be cheering you on for it.

Good luck x.

In response to: Re: Alcoholic

Re: Alcoholic

Thank you.

In response to: Re: Alcoholic

Re: Alcoholic

Thankyou and I hope you can have some good moments today

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