@Former-Member wrote:
Nothing she said could help me. She was very adamant that I shouldn't feel lonely, because I have my family. I am not emotionally open with my family, though. They just wouldn't be able to handle it in a healthy way.
One day, I described a very vivid and intense period of suicidal thoughts. I was angry that no-one was there for me. I only came back from the edge of death because I had to go to a meeting. No-one knew or cared how I felt. She went as far as to say "but you weren't alone. It was your choice not to reach out to your family." That straight pissed me off.
This is one of the things that really appalls me, especially because it is so commonplace. When you hire a therapist, you are hiring a professional helper. i.e. You should be able to reasonably depend on getting assistance that beats what you would get out of a typical layman.
Yet by so many accounts, the assistance is noticeably poorer then what you would get out of a regular acquaintance.
Obviously, nobody knows what a person's family situation is straight off the bat, but for 98% of the population, once you'd explained to them that you are not close to your biological family, the other person would almost certainly understand and respect that and not continue to behave as if your family are an asset towards remedying your problem! People not getting along with their biological familiesis a very common issue! If anyone should appreciate the dynamics of that, it's a professional therapist who deals with emotional distress everyday!
Yet a rediculous percentage of therapists refuse to respect those very straightforward details that bear on a person's life and options. You go in to professional therapy and very likely have your case handled in a manner that is significantly poorer then what any amateur could manage! It's unbelievable! And it's happening all the time to patients left, right and center!
A couple years before I went in to therapy, I had a mate that tried to help me. He failed because he couldn't grasp the all-important subtle details that made all the differance, but he got pretty damn close to doing the job. It gave me rediculously high expectations of what I could expect from the professional assistance that cost $120+/hr.
I swear, if I only knew more everyday Joes with an inclination to be helpful for people in need, my life could be on track within a couple of weeks.
@Marmite wrote:
It's tough finding a Psychologist who is a good match, but is it asking too much that all qualified Psychologists should at least professional?
With the rising tide of patients vocally expressing their displeasure about the quality of therapy, I've noticed that a lot of the recent literature regarding future policy towards the mental health system reccommends "additional training" for therapists, as a way to remedy these quality issues.
I just roll my eyes when I read that. Training won't do a damned thing, except maybe teach therapists how to say all the right things to win over an examiner and/or an investigator who wants to measure her compassion and respect for patients.
Compassion can't be taught in a classroom. It can't be lectured in to someone. It can't be picked up by pulling an all-night study session bent over a 20lbs. textbook. Therapists (very often) see their patients as "lesser" people. You can't train that sort of prejudice out of someone. Infact, IMHO, the excessive training regime of the mental health industry probably bears a large part of the blame for why therapists are, so commonly, amongst the least-respectful people on the planet.
@Powderfinger wrote:
I.dont get attached or close to any therapist when I'm seeing one.
I.do not allow anyone, therapist or otherwise to be in charge of me getting better entirely. I keep my independence and do my own thing according to what I feel is right. Once my objective and outcome is something I'm satisfied with and my goal.is reached, if I don't like the person I move on.
...
Justice in this bullshit country has always been bullshit.
Basically I've reached a point in my life where I am using them to improve my life. If they don't cut it, I walk away, no explanation, no reasoning, and I am off. I'm under no.obligation to them, nor do I owe them anything. I paid, turned up and did the work. That's all that was required.
I do not allow anyone to be in charge of me and my recovery. I call the shots and I make it clear if need be.
TBH, When I read this post I can't help but wonder if there is some deliberate aspect to the way the system treats people like us. Is there a deliberate "devided they fall"-type strategy going on here? Is the system deliberately trying to turn us in to cold, detatched, distrustful people, so that we can't have strong relationships? So that we can't meaningfully engage with communities, societies & the world and thereby exert some infulence over them? Is it all about conning the crazies into self-isolating? Making us so distrustful and resentful of the world that we ourselves minimize all contact? Are they building the new asylums right inside our own attitudes & behaviors?
I just think it's strange that there is such widespread abuse going on in this industry where trust is so essential. I mean people must realize that when you hurt someone in the therapy environment that it is especially dammaging, not only to the patient themselves, but also to their trust and respect for the rest of humanity. I struggle to believe that the system isn't aware that these abuses make people colder, and therefore have significant impacts on their prospects for strong, meaningful relationships in the future.
I don't mean to sound judgemental, BTW. And I only mention this because I realize that I myself would be a cold, unpleasant patient if I ever went back to therapy, due to my previous ordeal in the system. I was a very friendly, charitable, compassionate person before I went in to therapy, but I feel that all of that has been burnt off off me now by my therapist. Now, I just can't see myself being anything better then suspicious, accusatory and impatient with anyone I might turn to in the future. And the catch 22 is that, as a general rule, when you treat people badly, you tend to get bad results. So I'd really just be shooting myself in the foot with my own prejudice.
I just can't get that bitch's taint out of my head.
