My biggest problem can't even be solved.

@Former-Member Things are sounding really hard for you right now. We do need human connections, that’s for sure. It’s finding the right people, that’s often the struggle.

It’s not a useless post, it’s how you feel, and that’s important. It’s no use saying things we don’t mean.

I’m listening, hearing and sending some ❣️❣️❣️

Hi @Former-Member, I can certainly relate to the struggle to find 'my people' and not necessarily having that human connection it sounds like you're craving and longing for. It's a frustrating and painful road, though I've learnt that love and human connection can come in all forms, not just romantic or family, but friends, even here on the forums is connection in a way. Behind this screen, writing this post, is another human, just like you. 😊

I found my people when I was just being me and when I wasn't actually actively looking for anyone to connect with per se but getting on with my life. As frustrating as it is, that often takes time. But, the othe other thing I'll say is that you do have a right to be upset, and it's understandable. The things we have little to no control over can be the things that are the most upsetting, for that simple fact that we have little to no control over it and there's not a lot we can actually do. It's ok. Be kind to yourself and we'll be here as you ride out this wave.

TideisTurning

Hey @Former-Member, I hear you - mental illness held me back from going on my first date for a long time, much longer than I wanted.

I also disagree with the idea that "you shouldn't need anyone to make you happy." What does this mean?- That you should be isolated from others, and happy like that? If anything, the increased isolation of covid/2020 made me very aware of how much I do need others. I think it's very normal and human to want to be connected to others - this is definitely not a useless post

I agree with what @TideisTurning said about how you can still have meaningful and valuable connections with people in other ways, e.g. friendships. There's a helpful list of suggestions here on ideas to develop connections with others. Also, I'm not sure if you've yet tried dating websites/apps? That can be another helpful way of meeting people. Seeing a MH professional helped keep my MI in check when I was going through this process myself. Also- though I know it's hard if you want it so much - try not to put too much pressure on yourself! For me love has often popped up when I least expected it/wasn't even looking 🌻