My Mosaic

Hi @fluffylight how are you?

The treadmill today is a real effort @fluffylight i don’t want to be on here, but it’s compulsive 😩

Rough day yesterday for you? I’ve been spending a bit more time recently curled up on my bed.

I probably won’t buy anything tomorrow… I’ll be working at the market. My mum has a small business, she makes baby and kids clothes and other bits and pieces. So I’ll be helping her sell. She’s made lots of cute Christmas outfits and dresses. It’s a big Christmas market. Last year it was one day and it was super busy, constant flow of customers, they were lined up around the block all day and we were on our feet all day. This year it’s over 2 days. I’m just helping tomorrow. My SIL will help Sunday.

It is what it is @Bow

Didn't go for a walk yesterday, just hid. Will try and make myself go today.

ptsd does suck. Christmas is really triggering for me. I try and make it a happy time for the kids but it is hard to keep that grin on my face.

Do you still see your supports over the xmas period?

I hope the market goes well tomorrow and that it is a success. Is D going as well?

Not much planned for today. There is a market on tomorrow close by but will what the weather is like.

Hi @fluffylight I hope your day is going well.

yeah Christmas can be a sucky time of the year eh @Snowie I also try to make it magical for my D but it is hard.

I have to sort my D’s advent calendar out next week so it’s ready to be hung while we are in tassie. Mum will have to organise the elf to arrive on the 1st…. We get back from tassie late on the 1st.

my support worker is working Christmas Day. And I’m going to assume cause she is having 2 weeks leave now that she will be around most of the holidays? Which will be good. My CM will go on maternity leave January or February. Not sure what leave my psychologist will take.

my D will be at her fathers tomorrow. The market organisers have asked that no stall holder kids be around stalls. We need to leave early, so her father will pick her up from the market…. Market organisers will just have to deal with her being there during set up.

It is a hard time. However I know how much you will make it a special time for D. It is so great when there is still that magic and innocence to it. I used to do an elf too. Most days I would wake up and think shit, I didn't move the elf!!

Even though my kids are older, I still buy them advent calendars @Bow!!

I do hope you have those supports through the holiday season hon. So much seems to close down even though it is a hard time for people.

I'm sure the market won't worry about D being there, especially when it is just at the start.

Oh I understand the avoidance and anxiety. @fluffylight What things do you have to do?

I really try not to get into bed, that’s a really bad day for me. I get up every morning and make my bed, I just sometimes end up curled up on my bed with a blanket. I have a mountain of pillows and just make myself comfy on top. With me not sleeping well, and not much intake and exercising every day still, I’m zapped of all my energy come afternoon, so that’s where I end up. I feel bad though come late afternoon and my daughter being home from school and her wanting to do stuff. Mum guilts big time.

I do struggle with the markets, especially this big Christmas market. it’s very over stimulating, loud and well busy. But I just have to soldier on. And then crash when I get home. Thankfully my daughter won’t be home until 6pm, so I’ll have a few hours to myself on my bed!
We have our regular country market next month and that’s a lot easier. And I don’t have to stay all day for that. I can set mum up, (she’ll have a marquee then) and then go home and then come back to pack up.

I do try to make it magical @Snowie there is a part of me that does love Christmas.

my d has a fabric advent calendar that I fill with random little things each year.
I actually bought myself an advent calendar this year. I was at office works the other day and they had an art one. Each day you get some kind of art supply. It looks heaps cool. So I’m excited for that.