My Mosaic

@Bow so definitively not your fault that there's this clash. I reckon if they try to have a go at you for missing the pdoc appt you can absolutely point out that the psych appt is a fixed, regular time, and that it is more important to you to keep that appt - would it be worth letting pdoc know beforehand that you won't be able to make it so they don't make assumptions about your absence?

Yeah maybe I can let them know I won’t be there @Jynx @that’s if I can get to my psych appointment too.

@Bow You got this hun, your psych has always sounded like a super understanding/helpful person so it might be a difficult session, but worth the effort 💜

What's happening for you right now @Bow? Sitting with you 💜

Comm mh came to give me my pill. They had been giving it to mum and mum was giving it to me a bit later as they had been coming anywhere between 5-7pm. New in today from the team, they had to give it to me to take in front of them or I couldn’t have it at all. BS. Why the bloody change??? They just want more control. They just wanna make my life more difficult.
They told me about my appointment. I told them I already knew about it and that I would not be attending. They asked why. I told them that I didn’t see the point. They all make the decision about my body that doesn’t belong to me so why bloody bother attending. They wanted to know what I meant about my body. I told them what my pdoc said to me about my body not being mine, that it belongs to everyone else, family, Drs and services. They were puzzled.
They encouraged me to go and mentioned my CM. I explained that she probably wouldn’t even bother attending either. Explained that given everything that happened last week and that she was there, but couldn’t make the effort to attend on Friday. I explained some other on going issues I’ve had with my CM and they asked if exploring options to have a new CM is something that I would like, I said yes. They will pass that on to their team leader. I also expressed… with mums backing, my disappointment and frustration around my psychologist, that I was seeing my old one weekly and now I’m down to fortnightly and that it was pretty obvious that I need extra support. They will raise that also- I told them I’ve mentioned it numerous times with my CM but I get some BS response from her also.
I vented alot of frustration about what has happened and is currently happening. They will pass on a lot of information. But said I would not be attending my pdoc appointment.
I’m just so over everything. I’ve had enough.

Quite a whirlwind @Bow but it sounds like they really took the time to listen to you and to what you're dealing with. I'm sorry it had to get passed on rather than you just being listened to in the first place.

Do you feel a little better knowing these things will be passed on?

I guess I was not expecting any of that to of been said or happen @Jynx I did feel a little bit heard, and if things happen as a result, then yes, maybe I could feel a little better. But I will not hold my breath.

mistakes can’t be undone

I will keep my fingers and toesies crossed for you @Bow. I'm guessing they will deliver meds again tomorrow, so you can check in to see how things are progressing.

Yeah, I’m gonna guess someone will let me know what the plan is @Jynx …. What my pdoc would communicate with me if I was to attend my appointment. Either maybe my CM or psychologist. Time will tell I suppose.
anxious now.