My Mosaic

Aye it's suffocating because it's related to one of your basic needs hun - housing insecurity is very real anxiety because having a safe place to call home is so vital to our sense of safety @Bow

Focus maybe on what you can control tonight? Want a cuppa?

You say it…. Explain it… so well @Jynx thank you.

yeah maybe a cuppa would be nice. Weather cooling down I’ve started having an evening cuppa of chai.

@Bow any time hun. It's a lot harder to remember those things when you're in the thick of it, always happy to remind ya!

I love chai, that's a great idea. Oh now I'm torn between having a chai, or a chamomile and spiced apple. Hmmmm 🤔

Or maybe I’m just stupid and oblivious to that stuff and need people to explain it to me @Jynx

Hmm chamomile and spiced apple… interesting. Do you like T2? I wish I liked tea

@Bow it takes a long, concentrated effort to untangle ourselves from the systems of socialisation that convince us that we should just be able to cope with.... all of this SUPER STRESSFUL LIFE STUFF.

Like moving house in a hugely expensive and competitive time to do so whilst the cost of living is skyrocketing and wages are not.... not to mention juggling raising a child and surviving a ruthless slew of mental health challenges whilst being bombarded by a stream of terrible news from a small glowing rectangle of doom every day, and somehow you're supposed to be skipping along like this is all in a day's work?

Darling you are doing SO FINE.

You are not stupid, you are human, you cannot be blamed for not having knowledge you were not taught. It's like saying I'm stupid because no one has taught me theoretical physics. Sure, I would look dumb as heck next to one of those guys but I just haven't been exposed to the same information, that's all.

Thanks @Jynx

just crawled into bed crying. Had enough of today want it over

PS @Bow the only reason I don't buy T2 is cos it's so PRICEY. But I love me a fruity silly nonsense tea, yes 😋

Just say this @Bow and honestly, sounds like the right idea. I feel a call to bed my own self, and I think a good cry would help me right now. I hope it helps you too hun. Night night 💜

Hope you’re doing ok today @Jynx ? Had a good cry and a good sleep? Did your chat with your partner end on? Resolved? That kinda thing hanging over your shoulder can be dang stressful!

I actually ended up sleeping ok. I was surprised!

real estate for the house we were offered yesterday called before 9am! Wanting to know why we hadn’t paid the folding fee. We asked why it was 2 weeks and not the 1 week that it said it couldn’t exceed. She said it was 2 weeks cause we were taking the lease straight away and it’s basically the 2 weeks rent in advance. Mum hesitated and said she would pay it shortly.

I called the real estate of the house we really want around the corner, explained what was going on and she said she would get an answer for us this morning.

But 10mins later we got an email from the first real estate saying the landlord had withdrawn our application for not paying the holding fee 😩. (Already relisted for $40 cheaper a week!)

4:30pm and still nothing from the other realtor estate 😩

if we don’t get this one we are back to the beginning and have 1 week to get out.

I packed, removed shelves and baby gates, filled holes, painted and watches more episodes of 24.

my anxiety is still stupid high. That uncertainty, not knowing, lack of control has been real bad today. My SW called mid afternoon. I was really hoping she would call in the morning and say she had time for a home visit. But nope 😩 I won’t get one tomorrow cause of groups. Thursday won’t get one either and if I remember rightly she is off on Friday. I really need one. Talking over the phone, or if she pops into the office while I’m there for groups or while waiting for my psych appointment, it’s just not the same.

@Bow nah, more work to be done, but that is how it goes when you both have trauma to navigate on top of everything else! But I still feel quite positive about it all.

Did you tell her how urgent this need for a home visit feels at the moment? She can't make you a priority if she doesn't know that you are feeling this way!

I'm sorry about the RE agent, gosh what a nightmare. I hope tomorrow ends with relief!