My thread here. Would like more support

@SJT63 I didn't realise I'd been there for you in the past. I'm glad I was. People have lives of their own, me included. I guess out of sheer desperation, loneliness, isolation and being a writer, I thought that starting a thread and writing it out may have been some help to me. It's far from easy to do it. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I know something isn't right. I've never felt this way inside before. I feel utterly sad. Like in a state of disbelief and horror, yet so sad too. I get many flashbacks, I have to breathe and remind myself where I am. It's rather tiring and upsetting. I forget things so constant reminders.

I agree that it isn't wise really for anyone to start telling their whole life story on another person's thread, I thought that perhaps somebody would reach out and provide some hope to me in a dark place. Hear the pain I'm in and just do a little something to lighten this heavy load. Trying to do life amongst it all is getting too hard. I'm trying to tie things up so I can have a long rest. I'm getting there slowly.

Thanks for your message.

Ramble.

@Powderfinger I need to try and get some more sleep or today ain’t going to go well but wanted to let you know I’m here and can relate. Processing and working through this stuff is not easy. It’s like taking the dressing off a festering infected wound. You need to take it off and clean it out or it will just get worse and continue to fester and eat away at the flesh around it- eventually destroying (sorry if you had a visual of that! I certainly did, but it helped me just then 🙂). It’s when you clean it out and tend to it that the healing can begin. Not a pleasant thing to do but necessary. It takes time though. And just as a wound needs time and care, so do you. Be gentle with yourself

@Powderfinger

I have always found writing out events and my feelings towards them in great and intricate detail extrememely therapeutic. I have a thread here called something like "how was your weekend" (or something like that) which, imho, is extrememly well written.

You write well also and those of us reading your updates are transported there with you.

It's funny about perceptions. As a child I wished my parents would just give me a hiding instead of sending me to Coventry for days at a time. Their ability to simply ignore me was amazing, and my memory tells me it was days and days... but I remember with a child's perception so it could well have only been an hour or two. My folks are long gone, it doesn't matter any more.

I have been blessed with the ability to let stuff go.... mind you, it took decades of practice to acquire the skill. The skill now serves me well as I live with the MI of my partner who can be extremely cruel at times, and then doesn't remember.

Breathe my love, watch the sun arc it's way through the day, listen to the birds, eat if you can, remember to keep hydrated. Bathing is optional but water is not.

There are a lot of folks here who are listening.

xoxoxo

We're here, @Powderfinger , just not always as visible, like I said. Small towns can be hard with the limited availability of supports, so I'm glad to hear that the forums have been a safe place for you to seek support from your peers and connect with others.

TideisTurning 😊

@Bow I hope you got more sleep. I understand your metaphor. The last month has been so full.of events and work for me. Not all good events. At this point, I am wrapping EVERYTHING up now and organising a lot of time off. It is what I DEFINITELY need. I am hoping to have things wrapped up and finished by the end of next Monday. I am then taking an indefinite period of time off to focus on recovery and healing. I'm in a pretty bad place. I will be announcing some good news later in particular to this metaphor being used here. I will tag you in it.

Ramble

Hello @Powderfinger and others here.

I'm here if you want someone to talk to, or listen. I'll be going off shortly for the night but I'll catch up with you tomorrow or whenever I can, if you wish. No pressure for you to respond though.

Take care and be safe.

@Former-Member

Thank you, I come and I go. Sometimes I cannot get on here for a day or two and sometimes I come everyday. Thank you for your offer, it is very kind. I hope you have a great night.

Ramble

@SJT63

I am really not feeling good at all tonight. I will respond as best as I can.

The type of thread I have started here is not something I would do offline. I have a few professions. All of them the creative arts/humanitarian industries. Writer/Artist/Humanitarian. Thank you for the compliment on my writing. If I have succeeded in taking you there with my writing, that is good.

I do not have good memories of physical punishment. I do not know what Coventry is either. I looked it up, it seems to be a place in England? Letting stuff go is definitely an art, I can understand how it would have taken years to aquire that skill.

It sounds really challenging living with a partner who is cruel and then forgets. I was with someone like that one time. Engaged to be married in fact. I am so super glad that never went ahead. It was for different reasons they forgot though. Raging alocholic.

You said: Breathe my love, watch the sun arc it's way through the day, listen to the birds, eat if you can, remember to keep hydrated. Bathing is optional but water is not.

I loved that, Thank you!

Take really good care and I will look up that thread you mentioned.

Ramble.

Hey @Powderfinger , sorry I didn't reply to you sooner. No worries, I understand. No pressure for any member to be on here all the time.

Take care all, and hello to others here.