MintyXContributor
How to survive being a loner in college? Should I drop out?
For those who have managed to survive being a loner in school, how did you managed to do it? And also, if you are a loner in school, then how do you cope with group projects? Who do you partner up with?
It's my 2nd week of school today and I still don't have any friends in class. Every lesson, I'll just go to the lecture hall, sit alone by myself and not talk to anybody (because nobody bothered to talk to me) and then go home after lesson ends. Nobody bothered to talk to me in class so if I want to make friends in class I have to initiate conversations with people, but the problem is, I have anxiety and initiating conversations with people is the same as confessing my feelings to my crush, it makes me very nervous and give me extremely bad panic attacks.
Everybody there has already established their friendship group and I'm unable to enter their friendship group. I feel so left out in class. I feel like the odd one out.
During the first two days of class, I sat alone by myself right at the front row nearby the door because all the other seats have been taken up, and one seat away from me is this girl. The lecturer told me to stop being so isolated, so the girl ended up inviting me to sit next to her.
But because my classroom venue keeps changing and
I dislike sitting at the front row (sitting directly in front of the door makes me darn anxious especially when classmates keep coming in the door all the time and I didn't like all those attention focused on me
) so I decide to sit at the back row instead. So I went to sit alone at the back row. And now I am friendless again and during break time today I was thinking of going to the front row and sitting with that girl but my spot has been taken up by this guy from my class.
So now I can only sit alone by myself at the back row.
Now I am a loner again. I regret switching seats so much.
I should have just sat at the front row and suck it up.
Am I gonna sit alone in class until the day I graduate?
My spot has been taken up by the guy and I'm unable to sit there anymore.
And also what will happen if there is group projects? I won't have anybody to group together with.
Should I just drop out? Anyway, my main reasons for doing this course is because :
1) I want an associates degree as it will open up more doors.
2) My dad keep saying that I'll only end up dropping out and wasting money, and I want to prove him wrong
3) I want to overcome my anxiety
But now I am starting to find everything pointless. I don't really need that degree anyway, I can always start from an entry level job and then work my way up. There will be a day when my job will promote me anyway, I can't possibly stay at entry level forever.
I am so sick of being friendless in school. I have dropped out twice previously because of this friendless issue and I always have nobody to group with in school projects which sent me spiraling into panic attacks mode,
and now this is the 3rd school and I'm friendless again. I just seemed to intimidate people everywhere I go, maybe school just isn't the right environment for me.
Should I drop out now before it's too late? I feel so out of place here. Now is only the first semester, if I want to drop out it's better to do it now before it's too late and I end up wasting more money.