Rebuilding after the fires // share your story

I am in the region too, I understand your pain with being separated throughout the destaster. It’s so hard to describe how painful it was. Fearing for their life and your own all at the same time, having to force myself to mentally block them being stuck in the fire out of my mind, so I could survive in my own situation. The communication loss was so hard. There was a few hours there as I sheltered on the beach, my mind wondering all through horrible thoughts, knowing at that very moment the man I loved was battling this beast in jeans and a cotton t shirt in the thick bush. Chills. When I needed him and his warmth the most he was in serve danger. I’m so sorry you had the same. Thank you for sharing with us all

Hello @Burnt I'm so sorry to hear that you went through that.

At the time I couldn't deal with other people's stories (or my own actually). It was just so overwhelming and exhausting and heartbreaking. I'm at the stage now where it helps to know that there is a lot of common ground in these experiences. Take care.

Absolutely. As we near the anniversary’s to these nights, we finally open that tiny bit more.

The months dragged the disaster on, it was never ending, then covid right after was a whole new ball game. Now things are some what “normal” we can start our recovery; and starting to talk and share similarities of these events with others. Take it easy every day and open that more:

@frog @YouAreNotAlone
thanks for sharing - the loss of communications was terrifying
I have not be able to revisit many of the places as yet

Hi @YouAreNotAlone I have a nightmare related to the stay or go question. In it I choose to stay (which is the opposite to what happened in real life) and then find myself trapped and terrified.

People faced impossible dilemmas.

And the upcoming anniversaries are provoking a lot of anxiety. I can feel it rising with the temperature.

I am trying to look at what's different this year and not preempt how things will go.

Hello @Fizz @Former-Member @Burnt @Shaz51 hope you are travelling ok.

@frog

hi frog, have you found any strategies to help with those nightmares?

I’m an avid lucid dreamer- so may not be applicable however when I have nightmares it is similar. Instead of the question to stay or go, it’s more “to late to leave” and being forced to shelter in our house alone with my kids. Why the house burns down around us, the sequence is always run to the car; car to far gone. Run to the fire bunker; door won’t open or some other reason. Run down the road to escape to nearest neighbour; bridge burning. The dream ends with us crouching

down in the creek bed with a blanket then I wake up. The furthest I can rennet we got in the dream was the highway, with no one driving past stopping to help us. I remember each one so well: I think we die in the dream. It’s repetitive; with only minor details with the reasons we can’t escape changing. I can’t control the dream, however when I wake up I have made a routine of grounding myself. I go to the bathroom, walk to the kitchen and have a glass of cold water and sit down. I repeat to myself that DIDNT happen, we DID get out. I keep telling myself what I am picturing is not real ect. I then scrunch up the images flashing back in my head into a paper ball and visualise throwing it away. Depending on the effect on me that night I will either go back to bed or watch something funny on my phone to clear my mind.

I have found grounding myself is insanely important to do. To keep telling myself that did not happen, here are my children sleeping in their beds, here I am drinking a glass of water.

If you have found anything that helps post nightmares and feel comfortable to share, please do. I hope my tip somehow helps you when these happen next. @YouAreNotAlone

Thanks @Burnt

Grounding is the thing for me. I have to get up and walk on cool tiles and take in what's around me.

I tell myself: you are here now, the dream is in your head, but your body is safe in the here and now.

Hi everyone, I am really late to jump into this thread! But, reading over it this afternoon I wanted to acknowledge all the stories that have been shared here💙 @BPDSurvivor @YouAreNotAlone @frog @Shaz51 @Fizz @Burnt

I've noticed a few new members coming to share their stories this week too, so I might tag you both here in case this is a space you would find helpful @Poppet1 @Klutz