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Something’s not right

Need to vent

Need to vent

Hi everyone

I need to vent!!

I'm not coping

I'm not enjoying my new job. It's mundane, boring and triggering. For those who don't know, I was made redundant in my pharmacy job 4 days before Christmas. I then found a casual job at a supermarket. The job I do is very boring. I have far too much 'alone' time at work so my mind wanders to a lot of stuff. I asked my supervisor if i could learn the registers as thats what i would love to do. she replied that she couldn't until next year, don't know why as we are so short staffed and they need extras.

They advertise extra shifts or replacing a shift on facebook, which i really hate. but that's how they do it. i asked my supervisor if i could pick up extra shifts even though i don't know the registers. she replied yes thats fine that i would still do cleaning.

The other day a staff member posted she needed someone to do a shift. i was the first one tyo reply and accept the shift. another girl replied after me. the staff member replied back to me saying she would give that shift to the second girl as i don't know tyhe registers. I was so annoyed, angry and then upset. I feel used, and discriminated.

The problem is I am 'too scared' to confront my supervisor and ask again as i don't want the other member to get into gtrouble. so this means that i can't get any extra shifts until i learn the registers.

it is so wrong

the other issue i am having is seeing the old pharmacy customers. it's not an issue in that i see them, they love to talk. some still didn't know i had gone!!! but each time i see them and they say 'oh i am sorry to what happened to you' i get upset, hurt angry at the new owners. i miss the girls i used to work with and the job.

working for a much much bigger organisation is hard. there is so much clicks, so much politics and crap. i try to go in and do my job and go home.

but with so much time on my hands at work i start to think negatively.

i have recentyly had terrible vertigo, a 5 day migraine and today again another headache. i decided to call in sick and was spoken to so rude and short by the supervisor. it's like she doesn't believe me when i call in sick. and my anxiety is extremely high in having to ring her.

i don't have the confidence to leave and get another job. i feel i am not good enough

i am sorry to vent, i know a lot of you are struggling with your own issues. and that i should be thankful that i do have a job, as a lot of people have lost theirs.

4898 replies

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In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay I'm sorry you're feeling as though no one cares, and like you're not in need of support. Anger is a tough one, it burns and makes it hard to see clearly. I hope you're able to find a way to express it, as keeping it inside can create more pain. You're allowed to feel this way

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

I can't feel angry @Jynx

@I'm not meant to show emitions at hime

I'm meant to be the strong one

well it might be a bad night

I'm sorry shoukd not have posted

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

It's good you posted, and reaching out/using this space to express yourself @BlueBay .

Mmm that's really tough, that you have to keep it under control like that. Sometimes I have to express my anger in other ways - like shredding paper or punching a pillow. Stuff you can do that allows you to express the emotion without it being directed at anyone (and doesn't even have to be seen by others).

In any case if it's a bad night, know that your forums family is here for you.

In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hi BlueBay, I get where you're coming from. It's an up and down road to live with a gentleness and responsiveness to our social environment and interactions that hurt us. You may feel alone, but there's so many of us that share that difficulty. Venting is good cos it's connecting, and connecting is a fundamental human need.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

BlueBay anger can be a positive or negative emotion because anger has a lot of energy. I'm learning to talk about my troubles, but sometimes its too aweful to say to someone cos I still want to maintain that relationship, so write all the things down I feel about what happened and call the person some very unsavoury horrid names and say it like it is then I notice some positive statements creeping in to my writing that have a bit of forgiveness, and then I laugh at my self or the situation and the thing that was hurting me fades a bit.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Thanks @grayhorn for your replies

I'm so anxious

my anxiety is really high

I keep thinking my dad is going to die and I haven't seen him for months snd months

I am not coping tonight

@Jynx

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

That's a really awful thought to sit with @BlueBay , I can only imagine how much it's kicking your anxiety into overdrive. When that happens sometimes it seems like nothing will help us to feel calm.
It might be good for you to find some distraction, whether that's something active like colouring in or jumping into a social thread for instance.

If the feelings become too overwhelming then it's always a good idea to reach out to a crisis service. I know you're gonna be okay, even if it doesn't feel like it right now

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hugs my sister @BlueBay xoxox

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@Jynx @Shaz51 Thanks ❤️
I'm really finding tonight hard.
you know how much I love my dad

I've missed seeing him so much

I just want to kiss and hug him

gosh I feel like a little kid 😢

ive got to go to bed. I can't handle these strong emotions.
sitting with these emotions is really emotional

I really want my dad (Msybe this is me as a child screaming for their dad) 😢😢

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@Jynx @Shaz51

I feel like I need to escape

I need to run away

i need a plan

I need to escape

I can't cope

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