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Something’s not right

Need to vent

Need to vent

Hi everyone

I need to vent!!

I'm not coping

I'm not enjoying my new job. It's mundane, boring and triggering. For those who don't know, I was made redundant in my pharmacy job 4 days before Christmas. I then found a casual job at a supermarket. The job I do is very boring. I have far too much 'alone' time at work so my mind wanders to a lot of stuff. I asked my supervisor if i could learn the registers as thats what i would love to do. she replied that she couldn't until next year, don't know why as we are so short staffed and they need extras.

They advertise extra shifts or replacing a shift on facebook, which i really hate. but that's how they do it. i asked my supervisor if i could pick up extra shifts even though i don't know the registers. she replied yes thats fine that i would still do cleaning.

The other day a staff member posted she needed someone to do a shift. i was the first one tyo reply and accept the shift. another girl replied after me. the staff member replied back to me saying she would give that shift to the second girl as i don't know tyhe registers. I was so annoyed, angry and then upset. I feel used, and discriminated.

The problem is I am 'too scared' to confront my supervisor and ask again as i don't want the other member to get into gtrouble. so this means that i can't get any extra shifts until i learn the registers.

it is so wrong

the other issue i am having is seeing the old pharmacy customers. it's not an issue in that i see them, they love to talk. some still didn't know i had gone!!! but each time i see them and they say 'oh i am sorry to what happened to you' i get upset, hurt angry at the new owners. i miss the girls i used to work with and the job.

working for a much much bigger organisation is hard. there is so much clicks, so much politics and crap. i try to go in and do my job and go home.

but with so much time on my hands at work i start to think negatively.

i have recentyly had terrible vertigo, a 5 day migraine and today again another headache. i decided to call in sick and was spoken to so rude and short by the supervisor. it's like she doesn't believe me when i call in sick. and my anxiety is extremely high in having to ring her.

i don't have the confidence to leave and get another job. i feel i am not good enough

i am sorry to vent, i know a lot of you are struggling with your own issues. and that i should be thankful that i do have a job, as a lot of people have lost theirs.

4898 replies

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In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hi @BlueBay

I wanted to check in with you as it sounds like a really hard day today.

I cant imagine how stressful all of this has been for you and when something like paying for the GP comes up, I can imagine it makes it all the more real and painful.

I am glad you are sharing with the community how you are feeling, because sitting with so much self-blame, anger and shame can be so agonising. Know that we respect and support you just as you are.

I really wish I had a great solution for you here, but know that we see you and we are sitting with you.

Please feel free to keep us all updated with how you are travelling today ❤️

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Thanks @Former-Member I appreciate your support.
nothing will help

I feel useless snd every other negative word

I feel hated by lots of people

I feel so low that I can’t fix things

I’m angry emotional

I feel so horrible to not even afford a doctors bill. How bad is that. We have literally zero left in our account. That’s terrible. I’m sorry I’m so ashamed in even telling you.

In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Sorry you’re feeling so stressed @BlueBay

I can imagine it would feel embarrassing not being able to pay the doctor’s bill.
Perhaps give the receptionist a ring this afternoon and explain. If you’re a regular patient there, I think that they will understand and let you pay on Thursday.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Doctors not open today @Former-Member snd km the first appt on Monday is 7am which is my appt.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Silly me. I thought it was Friday. Explain to receptionist when you get there. I’m sure they’ll understand. @BlueBay

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Yeah guess I’ll tell them or directly to my doctor. I hate doing things like that because I like to pay my own way @Former-Member

@difficult time of my life is right now

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hello @BlueBay I think you’ll probably find the Dr more understanding than the front receptionist.

I’m sorry you’re in this predicament as it’s hard. I’ve been there in the past so I do feel for you.

Big squishy hugs

💙🤗💙🤗💙

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Thanks @Eve7 @Former-Member 🙏♥️

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay

I would talk to the dr directly and even ask if he will bulk bill you. There is no shame in asking.

In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hello @BlueBay

and others visiting and reading this thread, including

@Former-Member, @MDT , @Shaz51 , @Former-Member , @Emelia8 , @Owlunar , @BPDSurvivor , @oceangirl

You have asked, @BlueBay "What do I do??"

If I were in your position, I would endeavour to separate Situation and Events: from Possible Actions and Considerations: and Feelings:

.......... " ..........

"

Situation and Events:

  1. Doctors appointment Monday morning.
  2. Doctor wanted me to come and see him this week
  3. Limited funds. None available in bank account
  4. I have not enough money to pay him until Thursday {when hubby gets paid}.

  5. How do I tell him?

Possible Actions and Considerations:

  1. Proceed to Doctor's appointment on Monday
  2. Allow time to discuss, with receptionist, what options are available for payment to be made on Friday
  3. I will be able to pay on Friday.
  4. Doctor will possibly be unaware of financial arrangements made with receptionist until, or unless I discuss it with her/him.
  5. Doctor is likely to be very much more concerned with my health than my financial standing.
  6. I would be including, in my open discussion with the doctor, my concerns about my mental health, financial position and any other issues that are distressing me.
  7. Carefully and thoughtfully, consider my financial position, and any short to medium term things, that I and my family can do, to positively impact where my family and I are at.
  8. I need to remain aware that runaway and uncontrolled feelings will have a significantly negative impact on my situation and prevent me from addressing any of the most important issues.
  9. Cancel appointment?
  10. If I cancel appointment, I am likely to have to wait 2 weeks for another.

Feelings:

  1. Ashamed

  2. Embarrassed

  3. Guilt

  4. Stressing

  5. Anger about financial position.

6. Concern about Doctors reaction to payment delay {Hate?, anger?.}

7. Self blame.

8. Personally assumed fault

9. Feeling downgraded

10. Can I live like this

I would take this note, that I have written on the basis of the question I had originally asked, to assist me in my discussion with the doctor. I might even hand it to the doctor.

.......... " ..........

"

I hope that my description of what I might do will be helpful for you.

With Best Wishes

@HenryX

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