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Something’s not right

Need to vent

Need to vent

Hi everyone

I need to vent!!

I'm not coping

I'm not enjoying my new job. It's mundane, boring and triggering. For those who don't know, I was made redundant in my pharmacy job 4 days before Christmas. I then found a casual job at a supermarket. The job I do is very boring. I have far too much 'alone' time at work so my mind wanders to a lot of stuff. I asked my supervisor if i could learn the registers as thats what i would love to do. she replied that she couldn't until next year, don't know why as we are so short staffed and they need extras.

They advertise extra shifts or replacing a shift on facebook, which i really hate. but that's how they do it. i asked my supervisor if i could pick up extra shifts even though i don't know the registers. she replied yes thats fine that i would still do cleaning.

The other day a staff member posted she needed someone to do a shift. i was the first one tyo reply and accept the shift. another girl replied after me. the staff member replied back to me saying she would give that shift to the second girl as i don't know tyhe registers. I was so annoyed, angry and then upset. I feel used, and discriminated.

The problem is I am 'too scared' to confront my supervisor and ask again as i don't want the other member to get into gtrouble. so this means that i can't get any extra shifts until i learn the registers.

it is so wrong

the other issue i am having is seeing the old pharmacy customers. it's not an issue in that i see them, they love to talk. some still didn't know i had gone!!! but each time i see them and they say 'oh i am sorry to what happened to you' i get upset, hurt angry at the new owners. i miss the girls i used to work with and the job.

working for a much much bigger organisation is hard. there is so much clicks, so much politics and crap. i try to go in and do my job and go home.

but with so much time on my hands at work i start to think negatively.

i have recentyly had terrible vertigo, a 5 day migraine and today again another headache. i decided to call in sick and was spoken to so rude and short by the supervisor. it's like she doesn't believe me when i call in sick. and my anxiety is extremely high in having to ring her.

i don't have the confidence to leave and get another job. i feel i am not good enough

i am sorry to vent, i know a lot of you are struggling with your own issues. and that i should be thankful that i do have a job, as a lot of people have lost theirs.

4898 replies

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In response to: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Good morning @BlueBay

Hoping you got some sleep last night and today goes well for you.

I am glad that you can have a talk with the psych on Monday. Fingers crossed it goes well for you.

Lots of love and hugs 💕💕💕

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

I'm struggling tiday

I feel I've met everyone down

my family

not receiving any money is going to be very hard

I'm waiting for my ex boss to send me a separation wirk certificate so I can send to centrelink

My anxiety is not good one minute I'm just ok then next a crying mess

I'm trying very hard to stsy in the present moment

but damn those thoughts come back to tell me how bad it is

I feel if I close my eyes and sleep it will go away

trouble is I wake up and bang it's there agsin

hubby came this morning. We went for a walk for a coffee. It was a nice sunny day.
since then I had lunch and went to bed to sleep

my mum has been calling dsily

think she's worried

even my sister is messaging me to check in

i at times feel it would be better if I wasn't here

I seem to be a bother to everyone

snd feel I've let them down

@Snowie @Anastasia @Owlunar @Shaz51 @oceangirl @Emelia8

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hey @BlueBay I'm really sorry that today is such a rough one for you - and sounds like it's been like this for a little while too. I'm going to flick you an email to check in.

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay Hi my sister

You will be okay.

Focus on your health and everything else will fall into place.

We care about you so much.

Glad you have the support of your family too.

I think I might have a nap before dinner

We are in lockdown in Qld until Tuesday but I think it will be extended

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBay

Hi - it's really good that you are in hospital right now and perhaps you have been storing all this emotion up needing the time and place to experience it. It's not at all good and really - not true either - I hope you can get one of the staff to talk to right now. That is the best idea possible right now I think

You are far more of a person than the money you earn. You have far more imput into the world and your family than your job or your pay - you care for them - you cook for them - do the chores for them and you have been supporting all of your children for a long time

And you are definitely not a burden - you are worth your place here on earth, in your family and here in the forum. You are valued and loved - please don't sell yourself short

It upsets me terribly to think that it would be better if you were not here, that you are a bother to everyone and you have let your family down. This is not true - you put yourself out in a huge way to bring your children into the world and then bring them up. You are caring for them far longer than I cared for my family in that they have lived at home for far longer than a lot of young people.

I bet if you asked them they would agree that you are worth your space.

Please talk to some of the nurses where you are. I am so glad you are in hospital right now - I know that your GP didn't think so and the psyche seemed off-hand but you are battling and we all know that because you have really shared with us.

Take heart - you are loved

Dec

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

@BlueBayjust wanted to say I read your post

You're not alone xx

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

You haven't let anyone down hon @BlueBay and deserve to be here.

Glad you are in hospital where you can get the help you need.

We are here with and for you sweetie 💗💗💗

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

I see and hear you @BlueBay

Sending you love 💞

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

hello my sister @BlueBay , Here with you my sister xoxo

thank you @Owlunar , @frog , @Snowie , @Anastasia , @Jynx for being here with my sister xxx

In response to: Re: Need to vent

Re: Need to vent

Hi @Jynx thank you as always for your support. I'm sorry I didn't reply yesterday. I've gone from shock to anger to now hopeless and my anxiety is high. I can't even think of what I'll do when I go home. I am trying to stay in the present, but at times this huge anxiety comes out of nowhere and it hits me.


@Shaz51 @Anastasia @Snowie @frog @oceangirl @Owlunar @Emelia8

you have been a great support. Even though I have a few close friends, who by the way haven't even msg me to see how I am, you all understand. I know that if one of my friends was in my position I would be msg them. My mum has been ringing daily. My sons haven't even msg. I know they care but it would be nice.

the thing that is upsetting me is Tuesday is my birthday and I'm in here. Although I'm allowed to go out for a while it's not the same. But I guess this is where I need to be right now. Cake can wait.
my cholesterol is 8.5 and dr is concerned so I'm niw on meds but it's causing pains in stomach. Not sure id it's a flare up of diverticulitis or side effect. Dr is coming to see me this morning.
Still feeling a bit fragile but it's early days.
Once I get hime I'm going to fo yoga weekly and walk daily. I need to lose weight.
and the scary and anxious part - I need to look for work.
I'm trying to hold onto some hope thst things will work out. It's the uncertainty that's scaring me.

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