Raising Awareness of BPD - Flipping the Script

Sooo proud of you @BPDSurvivor 😀:ok_hand:❤

Hello @Former-Member

Hugs @Shaz51 @Former-Member .

It feels so great to be able to share both the ups and downs of mental health recovery. This is the reality of it. Recovery does not mean you'll never have setbacks. It's about riding out the waves. You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.

Thanks for your support,

BPDSurvivor

Hi @Shaz51

Well done @BPDSurvivor ❤️

You have come such a long way @BPDSurvivor to be able to recognise you towered experiencing 'a moment' and so helpful things/activities to help calm you down and get through the situation - I'm very proud of you!!

WIP & Levi xx

💖❤️💖

Hi to @Shaz51 @BlueBay @Former-Member @Nells @Judi9877

and anyone I may has missed by mistake

Hi @26aqua ,

Thanks for joining us here!

My weight loss was due to a mix of depression and BPD. My depression made eating pointless. I didn't see the need to eat despite, like you, having all the physical symptoms of hunger. Some people eat for comfort when they are depressed, but I was the opposite.

In terms of BPD, when someone asked me to eat, I flatly refused - in my mind, my entire BPD world was so chaotic and out of control, so food was something I COULD control - and I did.

Moving on from there, I no longer have depression. I may have depressive moments, but I definitely do not have depression. I still take anti-depressants and am working to tapering off these.

Just a note, meds help alleviate the symptoms that may come with BPD such as insomnia, depression, anxiety. However, targeted talking therapies is what works for BPD (e.g DBT, ACT, MBT). These therapies work on making changes in how we think and perceive things, hence it takes time.

I read your post about your conversation with your s/o. If he is willing to stick by you thick and thin, he will be greatly rewarded. PwBPD can be the most compassionate, sympathetic, caring people. Although recovery takes times, you will learn so much from it.

I don't see my BPD has something I need to 'get rid of'. I see it as something to embrace and learn from.

@26aqua , the BPD journey is an amazing one!

BPDSurvivor

Hi to everyone passing through:

@BlueBay @Andrab @Judi9877 @WIP @Nells @Shaz51 @Aniela @JJ4 @vashi @BPDrose @Luca33 @Sarah_850 @Olliesmum @asdfge @SunflowerMe @magical_journey @Tbo @sarvan @Snoopy56 @Ellan @sanity41 @Laylah @Flossy92 @Bow @BPDSurvivor @Jacaranda84 @LouisianaM @Andrab @Theodora @Et68

Hey @26aqua ,

Feel free to ask any questions here, particularly surrounding BPD.

Cheers,

BPDSurvivor

Hi @BPDSurvivor and everyone here!

**Potential Trigger Warning**

Thank you very much for sharing your BPD experience/moment with us on the forum @BPDSurvivor . You have made a lot of sense and one which I can relate to today in a way. If you don't mind, I'd like to share my moment of
today's experience please. Feel free to comment and add things to assist if anyone would like!

Today I was meant to go and look at rental properties (again!- it's a Saturday ritual right now for me and my housemate here in Melbourne) and I felt tired and stressed out. So tired that I didn't feel safe to drive yet was getting pressured by my housemate and then my twin sister who started to make comments about me getting too comfortable staying at her house (my car is broken down in her driveway and has been since Christmas so I'm living with her and using her car since I don't have enough money to fix it right now).

BPD moments - what I did around 9am

- Got angry and yelled at both my housemate for making me drive when I wasn't safe

- yelled at my twin as she doesn't understand what it is like to rent

- threatened to self harm

- felt my heart racing

- felt full of hatred towards both my housemate and sister for making me drive as I do all the driving

- tried to go back to sleep and hide away

- thought bad thoughts about things

What i didn't do-

- self harm

- isolate myself from either person

- apologise

- write things down until now

- think of how the other person would be thinking

- let people know why I was really upset (bored and tired of doing this and it is affecting my uni studies which I'm doing full time despite needing housing)

This was all before my twin decided to drive to the inspections. Basically I'm pretty sure I messed up. I'm trying to realise and accept that housing is important but I'm get scared when my sister says stuff like I deserve to be homeless and that I don't have any friends because of my MH and that I'm not a nice person. End result is we looked at some properties and that was it. I came home and spent part of the day trying to sleep my day and emotions away - a common strategy for me - before picking my housemate up from shopping. My twin and I are okay now because she's at work so she has to behave.

I didn't ask for MH and I hate that I have it but I'm stuck with it and at times, it's downright scary. I often don't like who I am and what I become with BPD at times (a monster in my eyes) but I don't know what to do. I feel like no one understands these moments and I struggle to communicate them with people as it's hard. I've taken some images of photos off Facebook and stuff of weather and things to act as writing cues to describe how I feel at certain times so I can write about them in a descriptive way as such about emotions which I plan to get around to doing, like of storms and waves crashing and of images of beaches and other nature scenes and stuff. This is all to help me communicate my feelings and thoughts so I can maybe show a MH person when I connect again as to what goes on inside my head. Does that make any sense at all?

Anyway, enough of me. Sorry it's so long and boring. I'm safe and that's the main thing. Thanks for reading this forum friends.

Take care and stay safe.

Judi9877