Unknown userMember
Extreme mood swings
Hi All
I'm no stranger to mood swings. I don't know life without mood swings, rage and constant anxiety. I have flashbacks and intrusive thoughts. But since earlier this year my mood swings have become extreme and frequent, from deep depression, suicidal thinking, planning to alert, anxious, hypomanic, elevated and dissociation, switching during the day, most days. I find it hard to live like this. I'm on meds, I've been on different combinations of meds, in therapy, I've talked to my psych about it... I often just don't want to live with myself anymore. I hide when I'm unwell, so people don't see that side and I try to keep safe by riding it out, yesterday I sat in the car half day, today hid in bed just to stay safe & thankfully got hold of helplines. I keep telling myself that at least I have elevated states in between and it's not only deep depression but in all honesty it's wearing me down. I just want my brain to shut up. I am safe, there are a whole lot of reasons behind that, but none of them has anything to do with love, care or future, there all 'practical' consideration.