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Something’s not right

Changing meds

Changing meds

Hi. I battled MDD & acute anxiety nearly all of my adult life. I've been on numerous different SSRIs, SRNIs, antipsychotics, tried rTMS & ECT. Am addicted to a benzo for my anxiety.

I am in the process of swapping out from a SRNI to a MAOI and the wash out period is hell. I really don't think I'm going to make it. This is the darkest place I have ever been.
I have no family support, honestly no friends, not able to work & are completely isolated.

i don't feel my medical team actually care much anymore, they are overwhelmed by new clients because of covid.

i hardly sleep, but the last thing in my mind before I do, is how much I want to die. It's the first thought of the day when I wake up.

what if this new medication doesn't work either??

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In response to: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Oh no! Well, to be honest, I've fallen into a heap this afternoon. I tend to always get worse mid to late arvo @Bow

Anything in particular upsetting you. Or, just 'stuff' in general?

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

I'm very similar @WIP the pending evening/night tends to send me down.
Ive also received an email from my psych this afternoon, after last weeks email to her I am concerned that tomorrow she is going to inform me that she will no longer be able to see me.
I'm angry, frustrated with myself. Not in a good headspace. I'm done to be honest.

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

What makes you think she will say she won't be able to see you anymore? I don't think she'll say that. You might be just reading too much into the email she sent @Bow

I'm sorry you feel angry and frustrated at yourself. Try to be kinder to yourself and not so hard on yourself.....easier said than done, I know!

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hi

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

When she says to ask about long term intensive therapy via another service @WIP ?

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Hi @Former-Member

I'm really sorry to hear about your Mum. Losing a parent is one of the most difficult things I've ever been through. I'm still dealing with my Dads passing.

There's no right or wrong way to handle it. I just say, be with her as much as you can (if that's possible).

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

I can't be with her. @WIP Long story

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

Oh, that does sound as though she feels you're in need of intensive therapy via another service @Bow

But it doesn't mean she's going to stop seeing you straight away. She should keep seeing you until you're booked in with another service.
In my experience last year, many psychologists had long waiting lists.

Ask her if you can keep seeing her until you get into alternative treatment.

Do you live in the city or are you in rural area?

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

I'm sorry to hear that @Former-Member

Waiting must be really hard.

Thinking of you, it's a really difficult time for you

In response to: Re: Changing meds

Re: Changing meds

cityish- an hour out of sydney.
I'm pretty devastated @WIP I really like her and waited ages to see her. My own fault. So stupid.

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