Changing meds

Hi @Former-Member

Thanks for your note

Yes, I'm 'inbetween' meds at the moment. Have been in a 'washout' period for the past week, before that I was tried a new class (MAOI) of antidepressant for 2 weeks, and it was the most excruciating, traumatic time of my life. There were days that I was very close to giving up, I couldn't keep my head above water. That class of AD, obviously didn't agree with me.

I am seeing my psychiatrist tomorrow and he wants to put me on a TSA class of med. And I've been doing all sorts of research and have decided I don't want to risk the potential side effects of this one, and have another horrendous experience. So, I'm going to ask to go back onto a SSRI that I was on probably 12 to 15 years ago.

I just hope he accepts my decision and doesn't push for what he wants. I'm very anxious about the appointment.

It's all trial and error, but a very difficult period of time.

Thanks for your well wishes

I hear you @WIP It is so hard when we do not have that offline support and it is even harder to find someone we click with and can actually help. I was super lucky that my GP has been fantastic from the beginning and took a lot of that into her own hands to help me. She searched for people she thought would be a good fit for me and after several attempts at trying to connect with some of them she found a great pdoc. I got very lucky with the psych - the one I was intially referred to was not available for weeks but I got into someone else in the same practice within a week. We also had to stop sessions after I was being re-traumatised - and that my GP also stopped for me after seeing how bad I was after one session. I have seen her again since but we have not delved into the past again. As a team everyone agreed that it was not a good idea for me to do that anymore so we now work more on the here and now.

I can therefore fully understand how hard it has been for you with your psych. 'Tough love' is not always how we need to be treated and if she cannot see that then it is a good idea you find someone knew - someone that will be more empathetic and help you work through things slowly - at least at your own pace. Life is hard enough without that extra pressure paced upon us.

So pleased you have little Levi and us here too Hon. It really does make so much differenec when we can be amongst people that not only get it but can also support each other.

Thanks @Zoe7

Sitting here crying......just feeling hopeless and stuck.

I'm so desperate for some help. I miss my old psychiatrist so much, he was so good to and for me. I feel incredibly let down by the professionals I've been seeing since he retired, and my MH is so much worse since being under their care.

I long to find someone I can 'click' with and trust again. But it's going to take time, and I'm not patient anymore. I've been hurting for so long, it doesn't feel things will ever get better. With this Stage 4 restriction, psych's are going to be in higher demand and it's going to be even harder to find one. I just want to feel better, every day hurts.

I'm sorry.

Hi @WIP

That's rough - we are seeing professionals for help - and sometimes we do have to speak up for ourselves and insist and persist in insisting and this is exhausting - I know because I have done it and - sigh - yes - it's also worth it

I suppose some therapists use tough love - but we go there for support and goal-setting - feedback on how we work things out - it must be tough to get tough love in that setting

And some therapists just don't work out - the last one I saw I saw but once - I had the feeling I was talking to a teenager - so I have saved my last three visits for someone else

As difficult as it seems and really is - we need to either let them know it's not working or move on

But then you are having trouble getting effective medication without side effects - so that's an added problem

I wonder if we can be mature enough to ever choose what kind of medication would help us - if SSRIs helped you in the past it might again - as least you need to be able to have a say

Dec

Yes @Owlunar things are rough and have been rough for awhile regarding the medical professionals I've been seeing. I've got a few problems in my plate and today is just another bad day. I have a bad day every day and have for a really long time.

Just feeling very alone and unsupported at the moment. Worried I won't be listened to during tomorrow's appointment. But I need to be persistent with how I'd like to proceed and hope to god, that the medication helps.

WIP

No need to be sorry Hon - we are here for you to unload and talk through all this @WIP and Hon I am more than happy to listen. It is an incredibly difficult time for you and this latest lockdown is making that all even harder. You are not alone on here WIP - so please keep reaching out and letting us know how you are feeling - sometimes the mere sharing of our pain and connecting with others that get it can actually help.

Thank you @Zoe7

You're very kind ❤️

It really is no drama at all Hon - I have been in that lonely, sad and hopeless place many times @WIP so not only get how hard it is but also know how much it helped to have someone to 'talk' to, to unload on and to feel supported - so reach out whenever you need - it really does make a difference to be able to connect with others who get it.

Sorry, I got a bit busy here. Went for a late food shop.
Sorry you're feeling so low. @WIP

I hope your appointment goes well tomorrow and that your psychiatrist will agree with the med you want to try.
Please feel free to tag me if you ever want to chat.
🤗

Thank you @Former-Member

Night.