Guiding_LightSenior Contributor
Feeling Suicidal? Then, you may need to read this.
Greetings brothers and sisters of Humanity
I acknowledge that some of you reading this are going through the rough seas, that some of you may be on the very last thread, and the thoughts of suicide on the surface may seem like a very reasonable option considering the circumstances and situation you find yourselves in, however, before you choose to take any irreversible action, please read this post.
Many of us on these forums know your pain, and many of us here are survivors of the same things you face.
I am one who has lived experience of the journey, a journey which is not found in books, nor is it taught in schools or understood by those coming solely from an academic background, there is no degree or qualification to match lived experience and I hope that what I have to share will help you to navigate the way out from the storm.
I speak from a place of lived experience from the darkest hells to the highest heavens, experience of suicidal thoughts emotions behaviours and how to overcome them.
Experience of overcoming and curing severe depression, fear, anxiety, and diagnosis/labels stuck on by psychs such as bipolar, schizophrenia, schizo-affective and the many labels that I would not let them put on me.
Experience of ultimate transformation to experience natural bliss joy and ecstacy, to take the spirtual path of true awakening.
I have found the cure for mental illness, and I am willing to share freely with those who need my service, who are willing to listen.
On today’s menu: Suicidal thoughts emotions and behaviours and how to overcome them.
With awareness of neuro-plasticity we know that we can transform our minds to work with us rather than against us, to re-program our own minds and put ourselves back in the driver seat of our lives.
Suicidal thoughts, emotions and behaviours can all be overcome and prevented.
You need to recognise that you are not your thoughts, this character creating the drama, the story of "me" creating the suffering, if you want to overcome suicidal thoughts emotions and behaviours, then that's the one that needs to be investigated and that's the one that needs to "die", NOT YOU.
Overcoming suicide is not about leaving the body but rather, it is about overcoming the "self" that causes the drama and suffering in the first place.
It's an ironic paradox, that we give ourselves the answer when we tell ourselves "I want to ___ myself" and that’s precisely what we need to do is to overcome the "self" / character saying those things.
To enquire and question into them, "to whom has this thought arisen?" (self-enquiry meditation) from an audience perspective, to distance ourselves from the little "me" which is a personality construct we have picked up, accumulated and created over time.
No-one is born suicidal, it's something we picked up, a character we are playing for a little while on the stage of life,
It's healthy to view the suicidal character as a kind of costume we're trying on, and that's ok, as Shakespeare said "all the worlds a stage".
This unconsciously created sense of "me" is not who we really are though this suicidal character, we are witness to it.
We saw it all, the name we were given, the likes, the dislikes, persona, personality construct, the happy, the sad, the angry, the loving, all of them, costumes, masks that we picked up from the world on our journey, a coming and going of faces, we have been witness to all of them, but we aren't a coming and going like them, we’ve always been here we watched the whole show, so who are we? (look into self enquiry meditation).
Please, dear one,
understand that you are needed, and you are worthy, otherwise you wouldn't be here. You are a part of creation, made out of divine material, LITERALLY the same material as stars, a valued brother or sister of the Human family, the Galactic family, and the Universal family and I care about you because you are my family.
You are rarer than the rarest of gems, you are infinitely unique and what you have to bring to the table is infinitely unique, you are a priceless jewel of which no price for your life can be made and You are worthy of your life or it would not have been granted and given to you.
I want you to know and understand that you are a gift to the world.
You are a unique expression of creation, this being that you are, this form that you are has never been before, and it will never come again and that alone is worth living for, that alone is precious and valuable, because you are irreplaceable.
I need to clarify that this isn't about self-worth or self-esteem or self-confidence, it is about the awareness of what is already here and who we really are; This is about becoming Self-less.
Self-esteem, self-worth and self-confidence can be dangerous investments, false investments because the self itself is not the value, it is an artificial construct, what I am referring to when I speak about value and worthiness is about our unique cosmic blueprint and expression of creation that we naturally are, not the personality construct of "Self" of "me" with likes and dislikes etc which was picked up and programmed into us.
You are going through a process of transformation, it is similar in nature to the caterpillar becoming a butterfly, and no caterpillar ever became a butterfly without the darkness and uncertainty of the cocoon first.
So please know that no storm lasts forever.
"Easier said than done" says who?
If you hear that saying, then this character too needs to be dealt with too, to whom has this thought arisen?, it's only an opinion that is picked up from society, another mask as previously stated, it's not entirely true, in fact it's a lie and I can prove it in yet another way, because the distance between change is only a couple of neurons and the neurons of the brain are faster than speech, so it’s actually easier done than said.
We cannot force a Butterfly from it's Cocoon before it's time, so be gentle with yourself, this transformation will take as long as it needs to.
Ok, so we made some mistakes in the past?, we messed up, things got shitty, perhaps we lost everything, but so what, each rung on the ladder was part of the journey and you will look back on this time in years to come as another rung on the ladder, and you will be glad you chose not to leave the body.
I'm even grateful now for all the suffering I went through, for every rung on the ladder that got me to where I am now, no matter how dark they were, they all contributed to my transformation and awakening and it was all worth it.
Some old sayings are good and helpful towards a stronger and clearer mind, they are tools to aid and assist our transformation,
I'm sure you've all heard the saying "There's no point in crying over spilt milk", envision this now: you have a cup of your favourite beverage, you get bumped, now watch it in your minds eye spill onto the floor, it's done, see it on the floor? It can't be undone, so any emotion and drama about that is pointless.
You have the ability to make peace with the past because it got us to where we are now, reading this, we can't change the past, and no amount of thinking can ever change that, it's something that we all must accept, however we can change how we view it, it was all part of the journey, rungs on the ladder, stepping stones upon the flowing river stream but it doesn't mean it has to be our present or future.
When we are learning to walk and we fall over, we don't just stay on the ground and give up do we? We get ourself off the floor, dust ourselves off, and try again until we can.
Some of us may not see a path or purpose for living just yet but that's just because we are temporarily experiencing the fog and that's ok, that’s a valid experience too, so be ok with the fog, it's part of the process, be ok with the cocoon, be ok with the darkness and soon;
The splendid glory of the sun will rise again and cast it's light upon you,
and you will know true peace within you, your heart will be cleansed of scars and pain; all suffering be gone.
You will be free again, to dance as a delicate blossom gracefully dances upon the warm and gentle spring breeze,
The gentleness of nature will warm your heart again, it hears you, it knows you, breathe, listen, connect, take your time, it's ok dear one, you are heard.
Again, We cannot force a Butterfly from it's Cocoon before it's time, be gentle with yourself, this transformation will take as long as it needs to.
Your story and where you are now is part of the journey to get you to where you need to go, its a stepping stone to overcome.
Your current situation is only the result and product of your past thoughts emotions and behaviours, it doesn't mean your reality is stuck that way.
The present moment is always a life saver out of any troubles because the past and future don't exist right now, they only exist in the mind as memory and imagination, the present moment is always a blank canvas to paint what we want.
Being present isn't something that takes effort, or an action that we "do" because there is no other time, more awareness of presence is acquired by letting go of past and future oriented mind.
Fear and anxiety arises because of a future oriented mind, its always about what might happen rather than what is happening.
Depression is always connected to the constructed personality, the identity of “me”, it is memory, and sometimes how that construction of past “me” relates to false perceptions of present and imaginary projections of “future”,
the reason you suffer is because you are identified with past and future which are both non-existential, they only exist in the mind as memory and imagination.
If, after everything I have said here, you're still waking up every day only wanting to die as I was, then you could also try this, as I did, to challenging those voices, by jumping out an Aeroplane, that is, to go skydiving, that way you will be faced with a very real life/death situation not knowing if the parachute will pull or not, and if you are happy to have your feet on the ground at the end of it, then you know you want to live and it can help to put the mind at ease if they rise again, you can remind yourself that you've already been through it and decided that you want to live and eventually they will have no power over you and cease all together.
What you face right now is only temporary,
This mountain doesn't have to be as big as what your mind has made it out to be, and you may be surprised how strong and capable you really are once you CHOOSE to get back in the driver seat of your life.
Please know,
No storm lasts forever and you are going through a transformational period,
There is a reason and purpose for all of it, even if you can't see it yet.
You will get through this if you give yourself a chance, and choose to allow yourself to do so.
It is the pressure upon a piece of Coal which turns it into a Diamond, and when you get through all of this you will be even stronger.
Stay safe, stay strong,
Breathe, everything will be ok.
Peace,
Namaskaram,
Guiding_Light
P.S - If you wish to know more about self Inquiry I will provide a link here, Most specifically the practice described by Ramana Maharshi,
there are others who also speak about this such as Mooji, Rupert Spira, Eckhart Tolle and Sadhguru to some extent (well worth listening to, you can find them all on youtube, one or the other will make most sense for you and surely be beneficial).
So here is a link to get you started, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymvj01q44o0 also please look at the related suggestions and you will surely find the way, one who understands this practice and does enough of it, will understand themself fully, they will understand the mind and have far more mental clarity and eventually mastery, they will understand their reality and it's basic mechanisms and ultimately the secrets and truth of the universe, the inner and outer.
