Any diagnosed germophobes or hoarders on this forum?

Your experiences sound so disheartening @chibam . I can hear how frustrating this has been for you. Your feelings are valid. No one can deny what you have experienced.

Moving forward, have you been able to find ways that have been more helpful for you?

Fraid not, @tyme . But to be fair, I've lost the oomph and faith to really take a leap of faith towards anything. My time in therapy was so bad, and I was stuck there for 7 years with no way out.

You ever see those movie/TV scenes where the cops have some ex-convict pinned down, and he's like frantically shouting: "I can't go back to prison! I can't go back to prison!" because his previous experiance just wrecked him so bad? Well, that's like me and therapy. I just can't risk going through what I went through before. Being trapped in that hole and never knowing when - or even if - you'll ever get out again; growing increasingly more unhinged every single day of it.

I lost control of my body one night and began flogging myself for no reason. Never had anything like that happen before or since. But just being trapped in therapy, having that woman mutilating my mind in her attempt to turn it into something it wasn't... it drove me literally mad.

I can't even begin to think of going anywhere near therapy again until I know for absolute certain what the therapist is going to do; and that I have some very reliable escape route out of there that can be activated at a moment's notice, incase everything goes to hell.

Oh, and BTW, the forums seem to be doing that funny thing again where they aren't notifying me of tags. I didn't get any notification of that post of yours; I just happened to refresh this thread and found it there by chance.

I hear there is so much trauma and hurt from what you have experienced and it is understandable why you would be feeling and reacting this way.

I absolutely captured what you are feeling when you spoke about the person going back to prison. I'm sorry you experienced this. I hear how disheartening it must be, and to be stuck for 7 years with no way out!

I can't say I share your experiences as my therapy has been beyond incredible. Yet I respect what you have shared as do others also. @chibam

Therapy may not be the way to go for you, and that's okay. I just really hope you find what works for you, because you deserve it.

We are here for you.

Hey @NatureLover @Dimity @scruffypuffball ,

How are you all?

How is life treating you? 🙂

Thanks, @tyme .

Not good @tyme . Find myself in turf wars between public and private health over responsibility for care after an emergency stopgap treatment for something that went wrong..

@chibam have you considered DIY therapy with a workbook - they're available for CBT, ACT and maybe other modalities? Then hiving off the "fixing your life" personal help to user-pays services in the commercial realm? Completely bypassing the therapy impasse of disinterested but actually uninterested therapists? Just a thought.

Maybe I've been lucky. This time around my psychologist told me what she'd do, how long it would take and what boundaries she'd set. I bucked, we compromised a little, but the structure although limiting feels secure.

Awww @Dimity ,

I'm so sorry to hear this. It sounds so hard for you. I hope it gets resolved. It's never pleasant when dealing with $$$ issues...

Hugs. I wish I could do something to make it easier for you.

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@chibam wrote:
I was under the impression that psychosocial therapists do that sort of stuff you describe for the social worker.

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Yes, I imagine they do, but with talk therapy as well? @chibam

One thing puzzles me - why you felt trapped for 7 years, why you couldn't leave the therapy? (Am curious, but if it's too painful to talk about, I understand)

And I do understand the horrors of going back to a place / thing that was so utterly and intensely damaging 🫂

Sending care, @chibam ...

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@Dimity wrote:

@NatureLover no it wasn't for MH. I got stopgap treatment overnight, and think tomorrow after follow-up from the specialist I'll be told I need surgery. I'm being shunted between hospitals at the moment so it's a bit piecemeal. Hopefully my new gp will help me navigate it.

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@Dimity Am horrified that something has gone so wrong that you might need immediate surgery! 😮

Either with your eyes (God forbid) or your back...am so sorry to hear 😢

Sending wishes for you and lots of care ❤️

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@tyme wrote:

Hey @NatureLover @Dimity @scruffypuffball ,

How are you all?

How is life treating you? 🙂

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@tyme - you see, I'm answering you instead of avoiding the question like usual! 🙂 That's down to your efforts 🙂

I'm doing OK thanks. The yearly S.A.D hasn't set in yet thankfully, despite the cold gloomy weather in Melbourne. Once it sets in it lasts for months and I find it hard to get up or do anything. I do still go to my volunteer job and medical appts as much as possible, but apart from that I struggle to achieve anything. It hasn't hit yet though... 🤞 My large therapy lamp that I got 2 years ago really helps.

I've been keeping the house as neat as possible as the inspection hasn't happened yet for some reason. I still have some areas to clean though, like windows, oven, verandah, dusting, vacuuming and finishing scrubbing the shower (it's mostly done). But for a hoarder I'm managing to maintain the neatness mostly, and am hoping it gets me in the habit of having a neat house.

Thanks for asking 🙂

I hope all is well with you too?