Any diagnosed germophobes or hoarders on this forum?

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@Dimity wrote:

For me I think I have to disentangle how having stuff has buffered against past or present or future trauma. Sometimes it's avoidance, sometimes it's clinging to associations - so it's complicated. And so facing it is intrinsically anxiety inducing.

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You're right, hoarding is complex. And it's almost sometimes like facing trauma, facing those objects and what they represent. I dread it. That's something (the facing trauma bit) I hadn't realised before, so thanks for prompting me to think about it. I wonder if that's why it's so hard to do it by ourselves. At least, you seem to have good success in plugging away at it by yourself, but I don't - not yet at least.

Yes, I reward myself, with a lie down after my helper has gone, a good book and a pizza or something nice to eat. I can't have music on while I sort through things though. Maybe as a reward instead.

@Dimity

@NatureLover yes it's hard to do it by ourselves. I wouldn't say I have good success - I'm constantly failing but am obstinate enough to keep trying again.

So far I've been doing it for its own sake but feel the need to start treating myself, perhaps as practice in what might come next.

How is your garden faring in the warmer weather? My roses are flowering well after a summer prune.

@Dimity I see it as a victory that you can keep plugging away every day at it - that's something I haven't achieved yet and I've been trying for months (or years). It's also a tremendous victory that "you keep failing but are obstinate enough to keep trying again". 👍

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@Dimity wrote:

perhaps as practice in what might come next.

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Not sure what you mean by this bit?

The garden here is a big communal garden for 5 houses...only two of us take any care of the garden, and share the watering and pruning and raking. It's still a huge watering burden in summer. But it's a truly beautiful garden and nourishes my soul. The roses are finished for now I think? Unless they will come back...my neighbour did prune them recently. Glad yours are still flowering.

Oh - my friend said she can't come today to help me with the boxes, or next week either. I've decided to take one of the boxes in the shed to the Opp Shop this morning, then bring out one other box to work on over the next week by myself. Another neighbour needs to share the shed (making 3 of us) so I need to work on it if possible by myself.

What are your plans for today / this weekend? I've forgotten which day your helper comes?

Hello @NatureLover it's good if you can keep going until your friend helps again... I wonder if you can surprise her.

As for me I'm losing track. My helper came Thursday but we spent most of the time talking. I have too many boxes (packed and unpacked) out at the moment and need to consolidate. I'm trying not to be too disappointed as I can see how it built up over many years... illness, bereavements, struggles with work and study, family conflict. There's a kernel of self-identity there somewhere. I've been in survival mode and am out of practice at enjoying much - hopefully there's light at the end of the tunnel. Working purposefully without yet being able to envisage the outcomes is what I meant. And hoping to discover (rediscover) pleasant pastimes.

Your garden sounds nice. I used to look after the common areas and planted shrubs and herbaceous perennials but have seen them gradually disappear as at least some of the other owners prefer the look of "flat lawn". Your roses may well have an autumn flush of flowering after the pruning. I'm pondering spring bulbs at the moment, as I used to pot up daffodils and hyacinths, but I can't remember where I put the new season's catalogue!

I hope you have a restful weekend.

Best wishes

Dimity

Thanks @Dimity , yes, I'm hoping I can surprise my friend with at least one box from the shed done in her absence. I didn't end up taking the box to the Opp Shop as it wasn't full. And the one box I brought out from the shed is full of papers. I'm only going to bring one box out of the shed at a time, so I'm not overwhelmed.

Thanks for explaining what you meant.

Does it help you to check in with someone? It helps me to say to someone, "Today I hope to achieve..." and then check in with them at the end of the day as to whether I've done it, and they do the same for their own sorting /cleaning /tidying.

I've actually lost the key to the shed - I borrowed my neighbour's key yesterday. But finding that key in the house somewhere is my goal for today. This involves sorting through bags on the floor and also the stuff on the kitchen bench, putting things away as I go.

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@Dimity wrote:

I've been in survival mode and am out of practice at enjoying much - hopefully there's light at the end of the tunnel.

And hoping to discover (rediscover) pleasant pastimes.

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I can relate to survival mode. I hope you can find those craft projects (and the new season catalogue) and start to enjoy things a bit more soon.

I am really enjoying our discussions, thank you 🙂

Dropping by with a whole lot of love and well wishes @NatureLover hoping that today is a good day for you and that you get through the things that you want to 💕

hello @Bow , @NatureLover @Dimity , @justanotherguy , @Eve7

I have things in bags to get rid of or take to the op shop and they are still in the spare bedroom not going anyway according to my mr shaz

not sure weather to put them back in the wardrobe and out of sight @tyme

Interesting @Shaz51 , does Mr Shaz have hoarding tendencies?

I hope you’ve all had a good Sunday

@Shaz51 @NatureLover @Bow @Dimity @tyme

💚🧡💙🤗💙🧡💚

Hi @Eve7 ! How's things? Missing you 🙂 Hope you are well.