Down but don't care

Hi there @Dontknow95

I am Whitehawk the moderator this evening. I welcome you to the forums with a heavy heart after reading your very moving post. It is great that you have reached out here with such an honest account of your situation and I am sorry it is so hard for you at the moment.

I am confident that you will be able to find support, connection and information here from the other members.

Let me also insist you that you are a unique and valuable person who deserves all the help in the world.

Would like like to talk about what you are going through? Please reach out off the forum for help to the different help lnes including the SANEHelp Cente ph 1800 18 7263.(10am to 10pm). Or try the 24/7 services: Lifeline 13 11 14, Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636 and Suicide Call Back on 1300 659 467.

Pleae take care and welcome aboard,

Whitehawk

@Dontknow95 Welcome.

I really am sorry you are feeling the swing of emotions. It’s hard, I know.

You are not worthless or wasting anyone’s time.

I dont have any advice, I know when I go to those places, advice is the last thing I want. Like you, I don’t know what I want.

I don’t know if you feel like looking around the forums. There are plenty of us struggling with one thing or another. You are welcome to join conversations.

Take care where you can.

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@Dontknow95 wrote:

I don't care about anything anymore. I have tried so hard to fight this but it always wins. I'm exhausted and don't know how to find the energy to keep fighting. My emotions are a mess. I'm so angry and hate everything and everyone at the moment. I can't concentrate on anything. I can't seem to stay awake during the day but am wired at night. I feel so numb. I just want to be alone. I also just want someone to care. I'm so lost. I don't know what I want. I know I need help but I don't know how to ask for it. Nor do I deserve it. I always push people away and end up back here whether I want to or not. I really do try but I always manage to fuck everything up and lose the people I care about. I don't know what to do. I feel so worthless and like I should just stop wasting everyones time.

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I care.....

We all care.

You are very resilient to be even talking about it. Guess that's a step towards asking in itself.

Many feel this way. Even myself at one stage. Baby steps. As much as that seems routine for this. It works