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Something’s not right

Maybe I do have DID.

LemonjuiceSenior Contributor20 Mar 2020, 9:19 pm AEDT

Maybe I do have DID.

Hi,

Something has happened to me over the last couple of days. I know I saw my counsellor on Monday, I know I have seen two psychiatrists in the last month, I know I travelled on a plane. I know intellectually that these things happened, but they all feel like a dream. It feels like it's been about a month, maybe over a months since I last saw my counsellor. You know feeling you have when you wake up from a dream, you remember it, but you know it was a dream and parts of it are missing. That's what this feels like. The thing is I do recall the events, dreamy or not, about the last month or so...this is why I didn't think I had DID, but now, I am thinking, before this weekend, I hadn't even noticed that things would fade, I just thought I had really bad memory. All the things that were happening during that time, the feelings, thoughts, etc, seem foreign to me now. For example, there was this obsession with going to a private hospital to do a program on trauma. I don't know what that was all about cause I am not interested, in the shrink who runs it or the program. And the counsellor wants us to see a new psychiatrist with expertise with DID, I don't want to go. I'm pretty strong, I don't need help, even my/our counsellor is just to get over this stressful period. There's no need for therapy, it's not like they can fix anything...upteenth therapist...:face_with_rolling_eyes:. The truth is, is that life is bloody hard, put one foot in front of the other, and keep going, focus on one day at a time, that's all. Still, how did I not notice these experiences...is it possible that I do have maybe a mild case of it, cause I don't black out, just time gets distorted. I don't know, stuff it, I am too old to be carrying on like this.

20 replies

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In response to: Maybe I do have DID.

Unknown userMember23 Mar 2020, 9:15 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Lemonjuice

Thank you so much. Yes it's sounds like me. Wow, it's never been explained that way before. I am feeling a great sense of relief right now and can't thank you enough. 💖

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

LemonjuiceSenior Contributor23 Mar 2020, 9:26 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Former-Member oh, cool. I'm glad you feel better about it. Do you have a therapist?

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

Unknown userMember23 Mar 2020, 9:31 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Lemonjuice, I have an amazing counsellor, but I am not so sure about my psychologist. I have been seeing her on and off for the past 10+ years and just do t feel like it's really helping at all. Because one of my alters has been extremely suicidal in the past 2 months I finally agreed to look for a psychiatrist and maybe a new psychologist. My counsellor has a mental health background but wants to build a strong support team for me.

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

LemonjuiceSenior Contributor23 Mar 2020, 9:48 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Former-Member lol, are you sure you're not one of my alters! Me too! I have a wonderful counsellor but she's part of a charity group, so it's unsteady, in the sense she can't see me more often, if I gain employment or money, I can't see her through them, etc. So, she started asking me to locate people where I could build a team around me and to get an assessment from a psychiatrist. Something I thought couldn't happen, has. In a two month period, I found a gp with knowledge of trauma issues, a psychiatrist who specializes in dissociation, a private hospital who specializes in dissociation, academics, etc. Up until then, I wasn't aware they existed. I obviously can't share the details, but I think it would be ok to look up the International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation ISSTD. They have a list of specialists in the field of trauma-dissociation. They also have educational stuff, research, conferences, videos, etc, if you become a member.

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

Unknown userMember23 Mar 2020, 10:08 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Lemonjuice

Lol, maybe 😂 My counsellor is private and not that expensive thank goodness. I seem to be there about 3 times a week. Thanks for the tip I will look them up tomorrow.

It terrifies me to be honest, it took my husband (ex) nearly 2 months to get me to see the counsellor that I have now.

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

LemonjuiceSenior Contributor23 Mar 2020, 10:21 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Former-Member I know that fear too. Take it slowly, one day at a time, one piece of information at a time. I think you have a curious mind and hey, after all you've been through, after ten years of this, I bet there's a part of you that just wants to know how to fix this and get on with life. No rush.

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

Unknown userMember23 Mar 2020, 10:28 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

Yes, I just want it over. Nightmares haven't stop, flashbacks are murder and even though my ex has said different I think the stress of dealing with it is one of the reasons my marriage failed. Thank you again. It has helped so much being able to chat with you.

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

LemonjuiceSenior Contributor24 Mar 2020, 4:55 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Former-Member hi, I am happy that I was able to help in any way. If you ever want to chat again, let me know.

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

Unknown userMember24 Mar 2020, 11:15 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

Hey @Lemonjuice ,

I had the best appointment with my counsellor today. Thanks to how you explained your view on DID made so much sense to me and opened up new conversations with her. Thanks again💖

In response to: Re: Maybe I do have DID.

LemonjuiceSenior Contributor24 Mar 2020, 11:18 pm AEDT

Re: Maybe I do have DID.

@Former-Member oh, wow, thanks. I'm so happy for you. I wish you and your counsellor all the best.💓

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

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