Being my Own Best Friend

@Owlunar I admire you in many ways. You have struggled,and fought through many deep valley experiences. Each on its own would have been enough for a whole lifetime.

I guess being my own best friend is something I possibly will never achieve, but I like to see others doing just that.

Your early life experiences were tough ones indeed. I guess for me, I realised I’d made a huge mistake fighting my way through birth. It hasn’t improved, as the fight goes on. I wish I could write positive words of having come through as you have, unfortunately I can’t. It always seems one step forward, ten steps back, repeat.

Its good to have people like you around @Owlunar , I think it’s hope. And even though it’s not a personal achievement, it’s a joy knowing it can be done.

You get thumbs up from me @Owlunar 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

A good idea you have @Owlunar For starting this thread.

Will try to contribute later.

Adge

A good idea you have @Dec For starting this thread.xxxx

wow my second mum @Owlunar you tagged 22 members -- way to go my mum xxxx

But how do we learn? - I have posted a few things - maybe overcoming a tough life is part of it -

how did you manage it? Do you want to know how

this is soo interesting -- I have had a few childhood situations before hitting adulthood

Hi @MDT @Shaz51 @outlander @Adge @Maggie

What a fantastic start - responses and so many supports - I forget how many

I have to be my own best friend and have a gradual start this morning but I hope to respond to everyone who has answered here - this is so encouraging

We find it easy to be kind and suportive to others - perhaps it's harder to be kind and encouraging to ourselves - let's see how the thread goes and hope it really lives

I do feel very maternal about the threads I start - and I wish everyone else the best they can be today

Dec

Hey @MDT

Great that you have replied - yes - people do change - I haven't been getting around the forum as much as might have been good to me - I was intending to spend my time in one particular area and for now that's unavailable so I have been posting more socially recently and this is good for me because I came here for support too and right now I need it more. Being our own best friend is learning to see this -

But it is true I have noticed you more lately - it is impossible to be in a position to talk to everyone here - I have no idea how many members there are but once I really notice someone I tend to keep in tough as much as possible

I am really glad you responded - I feel really encouraged

Dec

Hi @Shaz51

22 tags - wow - I didn't count them myself but yeah - I find it tricky - I tend to get my fingers in a twist and give up but this subject is really important to me - we do need to find out how to be our best friend - at the bottom line we are the only person we can really rely on to be there for us - we are the only one who really understands and we are always with us - we need to have our own back - I am learning this myself

Many problems start in childhood - some people in my generation call it "old school" - that was alright for their parents generation but it doesn't fit now. Maybe 70+ years ago people had kids because they just arrived. I remember asking my father what family planning was and never got an answer - perhaps there was a key to our problems in just that - planning families is a strange idea to older people - perhaps less to later generations

So - perhaps we just arrive and here is a kid to care for and the money has to come in and work has to be done and as much as I admired my parents' work ethic - I really hated it when I was a child - that chores etc came before worrying about the children - being sent outside in cold, bleak weather because the house was small and Dad was working night shift and sleeping though the day.

It's not something that will make us feel that we count. The thing is we can't change that and as much as it might bug us at times we have to grow past it - easier for some than others. How do we start learning self-esteem if we don't seem to count to others?

And we are so little. We have so much to learn. School can be a scary place for some children and other children can be cruel. And that was the way it was

Thanks Shaz - it's so great you are on board

Dec

Thanks @outlander

I know you are busy this week and will read and respond when you can

I hope your day is the best it can be - the weather is forecast to be very hot where you are and I know you are concerned for your sisters in hot weather - thinking of you

Dec

Hi @Adge

It's great you replied - I know you will respond later

I am glad I have finally started this thread too - it's something I have been thinking about for a while - I am sure we can all contribute something to the discussion

Dec