PND & marriage problems

Hi there, how are you?

This is my first time posting so I hope I am doing it correctly. Would love to know if anyone out there can relate or give any advice

I have a 2 year old son and after a lovely relaxed pregnancy was very unexpectedly diagnosed with pnd in the weeks after he was born. I was very emotional and while I knew I loved my baby so much I didn't feel I was cut out to be a mum and worried we had done the wrong thing having a baby, even though he was very much planned and wanted. Once I started taking the medication the fog cleared and I started to enjoy my little man, we are now the best of friends and I couldn't imagine my life without him! My husband was excellent during this time, really there for me.

I went off meds when he was about 6 months old, and have been coping well.

Over the past few months though my husband and I have been arguing a bit, always over the fact that I don't feel any love from him. He says he hasn't changed and when I really think about it I don't think that he probably has, I think that maybe I have changed since becoming a mum and I need that extra love and support and reassurance. I have asked him to show me more affection and really make me feel like he has thought about me every single day, just little things like leaving me a note or sending me a text during his work day etc. He feels he is trying hard and I keep knocking him down which is probably true to an extent, there has been improvement but generally only when I keep reminding him and I just want to be his first priority, someone he does nice things for and loves because it's second nature, not because I am at him all the time. He is an amazing dad and a hard worker, but I just feel no love at all and can feel my mood change and guard go up when he walks in the door from work even!

I sometimes wonder if I am being a bit irrational and maybe the pnd has come back in a different way causing these problems. I don't know how to distinguish if what I am feeling is real or not

I understand that this isn't somewhere to get diagnosed, but as a first step I just wanted to see what other people thought and if anyone has been through something similar.

Thank you so much x