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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth@Teej eth your garden sounds fabulous. Nothing like growing your own produce tastes and is so much better for you. We are starting to cook more. We have a slow cooker and are cooking veggie stews which we all eat together. Very healthy and good for the sense of family togetherness 🙂

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Teej yes Teej I am here too if you want to talk about it.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth@Teej I am feeling quite ill I have eaten a whole bag of Darrel Lea Licquorice!!!!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry for dropping off @eth, @Bunniekins. I had a phone call. I laughed at you walk with s2 @Bunniekins, that would make me smile too.

My strange day is lots of tears and trying to get through it but I would rather chat here than talk about it.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh dear @Bunniekins 😂. I hope is doesn’t go through you too quick.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Teej@eth My son is tall 7 foot and he gallops or walks really fast and is very conspicuous to everyone, waving his arms around .... I laugh at it now and wonder sometimes what people think then I brush it off and think that is my quirky son.

@Teej fair enough Teej you don't have to discuss anything you don't want to 🙂

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Teej that is me I cannot stop until I have eaten the whole bag .... I am like that with most things all or nothing. Are you the same Teej and @eth?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry to hear that @Teej Hope things even out for you soon.

LOL @Bunniekins a whole bag of liquorice! I love it too but try not to overdo it - well known consequences can be a tad unpleasant! Maybe some nuts to counterbalance it?

I'm also going to cook little chocolate hazelnut cakes for sil's exhibition opening and minestrone for a gathering here tomorrow night. If I disappear it's because sil comes back - she just messaged to say she'd be back soon. We don't have an electric beater so I'll be hand whipping about a dozen egg whites - that's the only part of the job I'm not specially looking forward to. In general I love cooking to share with others. We'll have at least 15 people here for dinner after the opening tomorrow night. Hoping I don't feel like too much of a wallflower.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I used to say that the kids who grew really tall really quickly always looked like baby giraffes. I knew a kid who was very talented at sport but that puberty growth thing threw all his coordination out of whack. @Bunniekins. Mine just turned into blobs and went so slow through that age. They picked up again after and transformed into men ok. During puberty it was like they only had one gear though.

@eth, @Bunniekins the kids and I ate fresh green peas for the first time on Tuesday night. They were yummy. It was another Jamie Oliver special. He has got us eating so many different combinations now.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth I always admire people who can cook it is quite a talent I think. I wish I could cook. Good luck with the night. You will be fine 🙂 xxx

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