FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

9,751 - 9,760 of 27,230

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Winter is a slow month @Mazarita but maybe when it warms abit you could go with C and have an outing?

Hmm it got down to 3 last night. Its snowing alot further south but we get the icy winds and sometimes sleet.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Brrrrrr, sounds chilly, @outlander. The days here have been sunny and mild, but a bit chilly in the flat. Still, we don't use the heating very often. Usually just rug up. Also the place is small and warms up from just the two of us being here with our warm bodies, and the warmth from the cooking, in the tiny kitchen, which is only divided off with a high bench from the main room. Hope you have some good heating where you are though.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

My pop and i have a heater in our rooms. Our house is super hot in the summer ( where outside is usually cooler) and then cold in winter (where outside is usually warmer) stupid isnt it.

Its been raining here and really windy. Weve had some sunny days though thats usually when i try to get a load of washing done

Hows tomorrow looking for you?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @outlander, @Mazarita

very tired , going to bed now , have not been sleeping well since saturday when mum was put in hospital 60 kms , kept waking up through the night thinking I hear the phone ringing

mum might need surgery again for bowel obstruction ,they are trying other treatment first before surgery

then also my MIL is going in for her second operation on her eyes

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Goodnight @Shaz51 I hope you sleep well. Im not surprised your not sleeping all that well with the added stress.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hugs, @Shaz51. A lot of family medical issues happening around you. Sending kind wishes for everyone's wellbeing. Hope you can find some relaxation amidst it all. Some deep breaths might help. Sleep well tonight, I hope.

Ah yes, @outlander, that reminds me of places I lived down south, with no insulation, so really not good for the weather inside the house. Tomorrow I have an outpatient's appointment at with a gynacologist at the hospital. Irregular result on a recent ultrasound. No symptoms though. I think it will be okay, though naturally a little anxious.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Its rather annoying i wish it was cold in summer and warm in winter but im not that lucky lol @Mazarita
Oh that sounds abit scary, id be nervous too. I hope it goes ok for you. Sending my love ❤

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you, @outlander

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Another wakeful night. 3.45 am. This time I haven't got into the video, though I had an idea for a new one after the one I'm making now (waiting on stuff from someone for that). And I wrote a poem on the 'writing as therapy' thread. And been chatting on the forum. And not tired. And powerfully reluctant to go to bed, as happens. I'm a bit scared of going to sleep tonight because of the three-time dream I had last night and this morning, scared it's going to happen again. And other stuff keeping me from my bed.

Maybe I'll get to sleep at first light, as is often the case when I'm awake at this time. It kind of tells me I'll now be awake until then. Luckily my outpatients appointment isn't until the afternoon. I think I don't want to sleep partly from anxiety about that too.

Well, that's enough of a rave.

Sweet sleep and rest to those who are doing that.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita @Appleblossom@Shaz51 @outlander @PeppiPatty @Sophia1@Bunniekins @Faith-and-Hope @Exoplanet and anyone else here who I've missed tagging.

Another early night with several breaks in sleep, but a total of 9 hours. Feeling a little more awake here than the last couple of days. Thanks for the twin comment @Sophia1 - after nearly 4 years connected here it still amazes me sometimes how much @Mazarita and I have in common. But enough differences to keep things interesting too.

Hoping to find the impetus to start pre-planning for my plan meeting with NDIS today - don't have a date for it yet but it should be early July. Spoke to my disability advocate yesterday and she thinks a pre-planning meeting with her and sil is a good idea so that should happen at the start of July when sil isn't so busy.

Sil's exhibition opens on Friday this week and there'll be lots of friends and family around from out of town for a couple of weeks. Treading on egg shells around her the last day or two - she had a major blow out of low confidence in what she's spent the last 7 months painting the night before last with bro (he told me about it) and I really don't want to bring her any extra stress. I'll be cooking some chocolate hazelnut cakes for the opening.

@PeppiPatty I say go for it with the study too.

Hope today is off to a gentle start for you all. Going to read the last few pages and catch up a bit now.

9,751 - 9,760 of 27,230