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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hilarious with the crunchie bar, @Bunniekins. I used to be totally addicted to chocolate and sweet things when I was young. Even when I went on a 800 calorie a day diet to lose weight, I had to factor in a crunchie bar every day! By the way, I lost about a couple of stone in weight, while still eating daily crunchies, lol. Was a very unhealthy diet I went on though and I was obsessed with food every second of the day.

It's lovely that you have good times like that with your daughter.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita o0o0o0o0o ..... we should call it Maz's 800 kalories a day Crunchie diet! I will remember that 😄 I remember reading about some models who were just eating carrots and their pupils and skin went orange.

Then there was the Israeli diet of green apples for so many days and something else for some other days .... all these fad diets. Your diet sounds the best so far though. Was it just Crunchie bars?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No, I had basic food for the rest of the diet, like one-egg omelettes, cereal with skim milk, and sugarless soft drinks (not healthy but, like the crunchies, had to have them for my sweet cravings). Somewhere along the line of my life, I have almost completely lost my taste for chocolate believe it or not. Almost never eat it now! @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita well I wish I could .... is it still dark where you are?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes, still dark here on my side of the flat. Might go over and open the blinds on the other side, which is where the sun first appears. @Bunniekins We are very east on the continent so it usually appears here a bit earlier than in most other places.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Facing east is lovely ... we face west not so good at any time of the year. Oh btw I have decided with much reading courtesy of your efforts that I veer towards secular spirituality. Suits me best. Now I just have to find others with like minds to converse with ...

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

The block of flats we are in does face east but there are no windows on that side of our flat. We do however have two giant window-doors on either side of our apartment. Just went outside for a smoke and there is indeed a bit of light in the sky now.

Cool that you have identified with secular spirituality. I kind of identify with that too, although I prefer not to give any of my spiritual inclinations a group name. I consider myself to have a 'personal spirituality'.

@Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Geez Maz I am so goody two shoes these days no smoking, no drinking, no partying, I need that Crunchie bar to remind me that I am a bad girl at heart 🙂 We have a whirlly gig thing on our roof and when it works (which it is now) it sounds like a express trains coming through it is hilarious. Don't like to ask the owner for a new one and it really doesnt bother me too much but when people come through they immediately ask what is this thundering noise lol 😄

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I wish I was a goody two shoes with the smoking, @Bunniekins. I used to be a goody two shoes when I was at school. Didn't actually take up smoking until I was in my mid-30s (after my divorce). Lol to the crunchie making you feel like a bad girl.

That whirly gig thing sounds weird. Is it one of those air vent things for the toilet? I seem to remember seeing them somewhere before. Must be weird for you and your visitors!

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Ahaha! I can hear one solitary bird .... morning is coming.

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