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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander, maybe she is being careful about rushing into it because of the instability med changes cause. Sounds a bit frustrating though. When do you see her again. Only my psychiatrist changes my psych meds. GP goes along with that.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I dont see the pdoc for another 6 weeks now @Mazarita if my meds arent changed by go in that time im not going as itll just be a waste of time. Ill need to ring gp and see when i can get in again tomorrow. Hopefully what she writes to my gp is more clear than what she told me today.
We covered other things like my unstable moods, SI and SH and the roles i play at home etc as well. Told her about the psych i had but no longer see as well.
Lots were covered but all seems really pointless at this point. I often leave scratching my head wondering what to make if the sessions lol.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I find value in sessions that are not necessarily to the point on anything. I find that talking face to face with a psychiatrist or psychologist about what is going on in my life, especially my emotional life, is a release. It doesn't always make logical sense at the time, or even thinking about it afterwards, but I trust that things are getting in deeper, without me even knowing it. That I am slowly being freed of things that have weighed me down for a long time. Not that I'm going to nirvana. Just that I feel overall, things slowly improve, as we ourselves learn along the way. Does that make any sense, @outlander?

Still, sometimes the practitioners we see are not the best and that makes it hard to make the most of the process. But it sounds good that you did talk about all those aspects of your life with her. Just doing that is a self-caring thing.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That makes perfect sense @Mazarita i find it can be helpful but i never fully trust anyone and im always very careful about what i say and i guess that takes up alot of energy. In a way in my mind i dont need to talk about things unless its relevent... im not much of a blurter- it often takes me abit if time to actually think but i try to be as honest as i can too. when it comes to talking to professionals i like the sessions to be a little productive i guess not really keep leaving me with more questions. A bit of direction does me some good. I dunno maybe im just strange...

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Appleblossom 💌

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Not strange, I think how you feel is fair enough, @outlander. I understand the trust issues because I don't tell my psychiatrist or psychologist or GP about some aspects of my life. What you said about that taking up a fair bit of energy is a really good way to put it. There are real reasons why I feel I can't be completely honest, but I really wish I could. A bit of direction is helpful though, as you say, even if it's surrounded by talk that is more freeform. Are there many psychiatrists and psychologists in your area to choose from?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks for getting it Maz. Its so hard to trust sometimes isnt it. When i speak to others i alway worry how itll impact my family. So i dont say alot unless i find it really neccessary. Like you i wish i could but i cant i hold more than just my life in my hands ao to speak.

There are a variety not so much psychiatrists that take medicare and the psychologist there are a few but i dont seem to get along with many of them and they all seem based around cbt and i dont want that. I spoke abit about that too and pdoc said dbt mixed with act would probably work well for me.

@Mazarita

Do you have both a pdoc and a psychologist for yourself? Are you happy with yours?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes, very happy with both my psychiatrist, who I've been seeing for about three to four years now; and my psychologist, who I've been seeing since the end of last year. They are great and have helped me a lot, especially the psychiatrist. The psychologist is helping me in different ways. I feel it gets better over time when seeing these practitioners.

In what way do you think it would impact your family if you were to open up more with your psych doctors, @outlander? My problem is that I don't trust that the sessions with these practitioners are fully private. I am bothered by how courts and other organisations can get access to our records.

My psychologist does 'emotion based therapy', combined with her own learnings along the way in a variety of ways I guess.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh im glad they are helpful @Mazarita its refreshing to hear someone has a good support system!



Well one of my worries is the one youve meantioned about confidetiality as i often worry people will takr things the wrong way or by a differet meaning. No one knows or will ever know about the sa however if i talk bad about family say they have been mean or about the roles i play i worry someone will take it the wrong way and itll affect mum and the kids in some way.
I also worry about some things i say likr SI and SH is now on my records and if it becomes to much ill loose my carers job and with that sort of record i prob wont be able to get back as carer or work with kids either. So i feel i need to watch everything i say and do. I want to grt help but i feel very restricted to.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I don't think it would hurt your family to talk in confidence with a medical professional about how you feel in the family. I understand your reluctance about things going on 'our record'. I suspect there may be registers relating to some of my issues too. The problem here seems to be a lack of complete privacy within our sessions.

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