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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@CheerBear, it's so lovely hearing your talk of your fur friends. I love cats, though I've rarely had one who lived with me. Usually visiting cats (love it when that happens), and random cats who let me pat them on suburban streets. Your sleep sounds difficult most of the time, it's great that you got a good couple of hours. I slept well too for the few hours I've had, with the help of a prn relaxant. It's no wonder they're addictive. They are very helpful (but I don't take them often).

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Oh yes, @CheerBear, I forgot to answer your question about the video. I love them at this early stage of completion. I admit I watch them over and over just for pleasure. It's my reward for spending so much, sometimes difficult, time with them in the making. This one I'm particularly happy with the way I've made the images. I wish I could tell you more, as well as share them with you.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I grew up with the most beautiful loyal cat and think that turned me into a cat lover @Mazarita. I had a very long catless gap and now won't be without one I think. I love street friend cats and am one of those people who befriends strays also 😊 Visiting cats are fun too.

I find my prn feels amazing (too amazing probably) but only lasts a couple of hours and I don't so much need falling asleep help at the moment as I do need something that helps me stay asleep without feeling horrible in the morning or knocking me out cold during the night. That something doesn't seem to be a thing though :face_with_rolling_eyes: I too think it's no wonder those kinds of relaxants are addictive. I kind of love the feeling they give me when I am kidless and can take them.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Great to hear youre happy with your video @Mazarita. I can understand the feeling of looking at it over again as a reward. I have photos of my yarn creations and sometimes enjoy just looking through the photos of the things I've made.

Are you able/ok to say whether it has music and what type of music (out of curiousity)? As much as it can be a bit frustrating to wish to know more, not knowing allows me to get lost in imagination which is fun ☺

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I agree @Mazarita creativity at night is at its best. @CheerBear I have been know to be sitting doing cross stitch at 4am. I have to go while concentration allows, otherwise, it's unpicking. How is your going? Furbaby is asleep on my knee after her breakfast. It's a tough life for some.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It has music, @CheerBear, and I better not say it in more detail, but I was involved with making that too.

Now I have to face the void in between projects, lol. When I'm involved in making one, I am distracted from the void I find in all the little spaces of my days. Didn't mean that sentence to come out so bleak. My life is good in so many ways. But I do seem to have this painful void in me, throughout days, that I find it hard to just 'sit with'.

Stray cats are great too, especially when they turn up at the door. One was adopted into a share house I was living. I was just there for about six months but the couple I was living with adopted the cat. She'd arrived around midnight when I was sitting out in the back yard crying. She just hung out with me and made me feel better. I loved her.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Maggie, I love the image of you doing cross stitch at 4am. Resourceful to find things to do when sleepless. Have you always had sleep problems. I was a night owl when I could even as a child.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I can see how crosstitch would be a great 4am doing thing @Maggie. I haven't picked mine up for a little while. I'm in a bit of a craft funk I think. Maybe now I don't have as many pressing things to need to do, I can get back in to them. Hugs for furbaby. Mouse is almost in the bar heater and Noodle has taken a spot on the beanbag. Yep - tough life!

Hearing you and understanding that void @Mazarita. The distraction, creative outlet, sense of achievement etc that would come with what you do, would make it difficult to be without I think.

How special with cat coming in to your life like that 😊 I think they often come in to our lives for a reason. We had a very banged up, easily frightened, protective mumma cat on the streets at our old house. It took many months of encouragement and coaxing to build her trust enough for me to be able to go near her and eventually, just before we had to leave, I was able to pat her. She was definitely a cat I'll remember.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Just made myself a coffee, @CheerBear, @Maggie. First light is not far away here.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Yes @Mazarita sleepless in Seattle is me. I've tried meds but even with two only manage two hrs sleep, then the heaviest daylong feelings. Not the zombie world anymore. I've been over medicated in the past, my choice now. Your creative activities sound interesting.

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