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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good Morning everyone

@eth @Mazarita @outlander @Appleblossom @NameUnknown @CheerBear @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @frog @Bunniekins @Former-Member and anyone else who wanders by ...

Eth, I found the link to the WEN parent company, however, it seems they do not send outside the US, and their distributor to Australia, Guthy Renker no longer seem to stock it.

So, I did some more searching for you and found these places - I cannot vouch for any of them:
wen-hair-products-australia and strawberrynet wen products

It seems a huge controversy over this might be what has lead to poor supply of the product in Australia.

I hope this works out for you @eth, I miss a hair care product from my young years Nutri Tonic, have never found anything even close to how good it was for my hair.

Good wishes for a pleasant day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks a lot @Former-Member I'll follow that up. There were stories about it making hair fall out that I saw when I searched for it, but it's never done that to mine. My hair grows faster with it.

Hope today is a good one for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good afternoon @Former-Member! Hoping you are having a beautiful day. The weather here again is a million degrees but is meant to rain tmorrow and for the rest of the week .... I cannot see a single cloud in the sky though .... who knows. Anyways ... have a fabulous rest of the day 😄 xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

thank you @Bunniekins for your kindness. It's a cleaning day for me today, and some other stuff has hit me hard so won't be around much today.

Have a very pleasant day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-Member You have me worried. Take care wont you. love gp xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

hello @eth, @Appleblossom, @Former-Member, @outlander, @Mazarita, @Former-Member, @Former-Member, and everyone else I couldn't tag,

how is everyone,

I haven't really been on for a few days. I am still waiting for the results of my male creators parole appeal and it is driving me bonkers.

My nan wants to get an operation done that has a 50% chance of killing her and while I am trying to be supportive of her desicion I'm not sure I really want her to do it. My mother is voicing loudly that she doesnt agree and that any Dr that suggests it to my nan should be fired from their profession. She has also said that anyone who supports my nan in getting to op done should not talk to nan while she is getting nan to change her mind. My mum is also trying to get my nan declared mentally incompetent to make decisions for herself so she can change her drs but doesnt want the responsibility of looking after my nan. I have tried to tell my mum that its not her choice and that she should just let her get the op done because if it is sucessfull it could give her another 5-10 years rather then the 2-3 they currently predict. My nan is in pain and my mum is making life harder.

also been feeling really down, doing stuff with my boy and partner over the weekend helped take my mind off somethings but not others. I also havent told my partner any of this yet because while he is extremly supportive he worries about me stressing so much cause i could relapse and start switching regularly again, while I am doing self care activities I havent done much of the ones that actually help because i dont wnt him to pick up on something is wrong.

He also believes that I should just cut my mother out of my life and even though i have a lot of anger and even hate towards her, I just cant bring myself to do something like that

anyway think I've rambled long enough

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins you are so kind. I'm just incredibly hurt by the machinations of someone I tried to help.

I'm always supposed to cut others so much goddamned slack, and never do I seem to get that same allowance - always have to be on top of it all. Didn't expect it here, should have, didn't. Silly me, again.

I'm just so over it.

The best way for me to deal with it is to not be here for a while. But, just so you know and dont' worry, Pea, they won't beat me. I'll be back, (maybe even later today) that I'll promise you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-Member Okay ... I am sorry it happened to you of all people. I will talk to you later xxx.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thinking of you both and sending warm wishes @NameUnknown and @Former-Member.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good afternoon @Mazarita .

Good to hear your news.and to keep in touch xoxo

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