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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander@Mazarita@Former-Member@Appleblossom@Shaz51 Good morning and back to bed for this lil bald pea 😄 xxx Hope you all are sleeping well.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins just a quickie to say I'm here if you still are.

Will answer posts in my next one.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Bunniekins @Mazarita @Former-Member @Former-Member @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @Shaz51 @frog @Appleblossom so nice to see ppl having some real time chat. Wishing I'd been around for it.

@Former-Member @Bunniekins @Former-Member After I had my premmie 14 weeks early and over the next few months (age 25) I developed quite a lot of grey. I also had alopecia from the stress of it all - completely bald patches. But over around 35-45 my dark brown filled in again. Now 54 and the grey has come back over the last 6 months or so - mostly around my part on the right hand side. I'm hoping it will become a solid streak while the rest of my hair is still dark. I've not used a hair dryer for about 30 years and almost never use inorganic products on it (most have petroleum byproducts in them). I've used WEN for nearly 10 years and my hair is much healthier than before. I also have some diluted with water in a spray bottle that I use daily. My hair seems to grow faster with it too, and not to get split ends. Unfortunately it looks like they've stopped making it - very hard to find it online any more.

I once had a perm when I was about 16 and still living with my parents. Such an unfortunate do ....we had a groomed standard poodle at the time and I looked just like her! My Mum named her 'Lookout' and if she ever escaped there'd be me, poodle-headed roaming the streets calling 'Lookout, Lookout'!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On a more serious note I spent Fri night and Sat morning very concerned for all my Darwin friends as a cyclone hit there. So far I've only been able to contact 2 of them and they are ok, but have a massive clean-up to do. As I was in cyclone Tracy in 1974 I take cyclone warnings very seriously, and worry for my friends a lot while it's happening.

@outlander and @Former-Member I hope you've both not had too much pain overnight and managed to get some rest and sleep.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Went back to sleep but thanks so much for the thought :)xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning sunshine to you @Bunniekins Hoping you have woken feeling refreshed and looking forward to your day. I read that your son is away for the weekend and hope you are making the most of the well-earned rest and respite.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Strange how our hair can change almost overnight like that through shock and stress in your case. God you have been through the mill eth haven't you .... such a strong woman coming out the end still compassionate and kind :).

You did give me a giggle reading about Lookout the poodle and you roaming the streets ... I can just imagine you running after this poodle screaming "Lookout!!" Hahaha!

Thoughts are with Darwin xx.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Glad you had a giggle @Bunniekins - best way to start the day. Do you have plans for today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth Yes he wont be home till late this afternoon and it makes a huge difference to have that break. Had a lovely sleep in and will take another nana nap later is very hot here today so wont go out but will do things around the house may even pick up a book to read which I find very hard to do these days.

Do you have anything on today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Should be heading up the valley with my bro @Bunniekins not sure what time. It'll be great to get out of town for the day. The valley where their community property is is so beautiful although very dry this year. So little rain in recent months that some of the farmers are taking the cattle onto the roadside to feed. There's a meeting this afternoon about the water pipe that runs through the valley.

Your day sounds perfect for really relaxing before your routine with him starts again.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

good morning @Bunniekins @eth @outlander @Mazarita @Former-Member @Appleblossom

I read that both greenpea and eth were up early then back for another sleep? hoping that you both feel rested at least...

The last two nights I have had solid sleep...I have been going to bed at the same time but reading longer...was able to finish one library book..another 3 to go now..

Hair...I have not heard of Wen products...I used different organic ones...the last one being david babaii which is made in canada I think...harder to find now...so bought a serum from the hairdressers to apply a little when dry...not organic though..would have petroleum in the product...

once I am over the hurdle and in action..I will go down to the city and find an outlet that stocks the organic products..

lookout...rather funny...the names that we call our pets...there was a period where every second person whom I met with a dog had named him Harry...that was my dad's name...

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