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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

OOPS post edited

Good morning @Mazarita @Bunniekins @Former-Member @outlander @Shaz51 @catgirl and @Former-Member @CheerBear @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Appleblossom and @Former-Member.

Haven't caught up on the 6 pages of posts since I last posted yesterday morning - wow it's been busy here. Thanks for the tags.

Hoping today is going well so far for every one.

@Former-Member I don't know you so Hi!

@Former-Member I've spotted you once or twice lately - nice to see you after so long.

@Mazarita sounds like yesterday went well. I'm happy for you.

@Former-Member the cruise sounds excellent - I also love getting out on the water. I grew up sailing so it's kind of in my blood. Very sorry to hear about your son. That situation must be so hard for you.

Cheers everyone, will go now and catch up on posts. I also missed last night's topic tuesday about PTSD. I spent the whole evening fiddling with the computer and my external hard drive with everything from the computer I had for several years in Darwin. Hadn't seen any of that stuff for over a year. Bro helped me with it so I had to do it when he was available. So I want to read through what happened in the PTSD discussion too.

Lots to catch up on. Feels like this morning has been barreling at me. So far I've booked my car for a safety check pre rego, gotten an earlier ap't with my psychiatrist, dealt with some new correspondence re my AAT/NDIS appeal, had 2 meetings with bro and sil ... I think that's all, all since 8am.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth,we did talk before not for a long time but.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry @Former-Member I had to scale down my involvement here as I was needing to put my health as a priority and couldn't help too many others.

@Bunniekins thinking of you and sending wishes for clarity and assertiveness for you with your NDIS meeting this morning.

@Shaz51 I hope you get the all clear from your mammogram. I find them extremely uncomfortable.

@Mazarita Art group always sounds good.

Maz and @Former-Member saw your chat about thinking deeply and what's been said to you about it. I too was always told I was too serious, thought too much, asked too many questions throughout my school years and into early adulthood.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, yes, it's been 'busy as bourke street' in here over the last day (Melbourne reference). Nice to see all the chat. I found Topic Tuesday last night interesting but was late to join because I didn't get any email notifications for several hours yesterday, then they all came through at once. That's a lot happening for you this morning. So glad you have an earlier psychiatrist appointment.

@Former-Member, had a big long walk on the beach yesterday with my old support worker. Very windy day and I got too much sun. Red faced me at the moment, literally. I go south on tomorrow week and will be largely offline for about three weeks, as I won't have computer access, or very little at the most. The medication adjustment is settling now. Mood has been much better over the past day or so. How cool that you get a smile from writing the word smile. Smiling back at you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

The walk on the beach always sounds lovely @Mazarita. Did you make it to art group this morning?

This week is the busiest I've had for a long time, and the next few are looking similar. Commitments averaging 4 days each week. My head isn't quite keeping up! Will be talking to the psychiatrist about the brain fog. Managed to get in to see her next Monday.

How are you feeling about your trip south now?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, sorry for the delay. Went off and had a wash and got dressed. Will be leaving for art group in a couple of hours. Awesome that the psychiatrist appointment is as soon as next Monday. I know what it's like, after not having a lot on, a week of four days with activities can seem like a lot. I'm sure you've got this. It will get easier to do as the weeks go by. I'm feeling daunted by my trip to Melbourne, as usual, with an extra dose of it because of the screening. It's always kind of frantic down there, the pace of the city, of meeting my mum's energy, of trying to fit in seeing as many old friends as possible. I skate on thin ice and could not maintain such a pace indefinitely. But by the time I come back home, I'm usually energised by it. Then there's the wind down of being here again, a relief.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds like you're very aware of the factors re the trip that you are dealing with or facing in the near future @Mazarita. Hopefully this awareness will ensure your self-care over this period.

I'm working my way through the topic tuesday pages from last night. So many of us with PTSD or cPTSD here but I guess that's not really a surprise. So often mental health takes a dive because of previous trauma (esp in childhood it seems). I hadn't realised the discussion would be so focused on PTG tho'.

I probably would have had a fair bit to say if I'd been part of it, but maybe a good thing I didn't. I am seeing the psychologist again this afternoon. That stirs me up enough. Not sure what our focus will be today but at least some of the time will be taken up by NDIS stuff. I resent that it eats into my therapy time.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth, how frustrating that you need to spend time with the psychologist on NDIS stuff. They don't make it easy for us to actually progress in our recovery process. Seems like an obstacle to recovery to have to go through the process really. Hopefully worth it if it comes through. In any case, I hope not too much time at your appointment today goes to that, and that it is helpful in other ways. I know you will be remembering to ground before leaving.

I'll do my best with self-care in Melbourne. It's a bit of a bronco ride for me really. An unavoidable risk. As much as I'd like to feel confident I will be emotionally safe while there, I can't ever really know that. So I just proceed with as much positive feeling as possible.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I've just decided not to even read all the topic tuesday thread this morning @Mazarita. Got about 5 pages in and realized my head is already busy enough for now. How did you feel about the discussion after it was over?

Positive feeling + awareness are going to help a lot in Melb. And maybe some strategy in advance - when I'm going to be with Mum I try to have a plan for how I can have even little bits of time out from her when needed e.g. something as simple as going out for a smoke.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I felt good about what was discussed last night, @eth, though I know some members found it triggering and difficult to follow. I think suzanne introduced it well, stipulating that it was not to say that PTG was something that happened instead of the negative experiences of trauma. More like both exist. It seemed positive to me to try to look for something good to come out of these experiences.

With Melbourne, I think I will have a talk to mum shortly after getting there and explain that I may need time out in my room. We are pretty frank with each other really. I've done this at other times when down there too, taken time out for a nap, meditation, phone time or just to organise my head about what needs to be done. I also like to take some quiet time organising my clothes and travel goods from time to time, so that things don't become too chaotic there either. Seems to help keep my head as clear as possible. I will be moving around a bit (going to the country to see friend for five days), so I need to be organised about how I travel with things.

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