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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

tell you gp that too @Former-Member thats what i mean by being honest as well. debts are a major cause of anxiety and depression even for those who dont normally struggle.

maybe you could set yourself up for better success by saying ill pay the fridge off, then get the roof done and then do the course in the next intake. that way youll be better off financially and maybe in a better headspace too

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Not really @outlander,the wind here is shocking,was trying to do that but hoping they don't send account for a few weeks until fridge is paid.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Former-Memberif your through housing commision go online and put in a request to fix your roof or ring them, that would be classed as more urgent and wont cost you money. thats the same as real estate, give them a ring and they have to fix it. unless the damaged was caused by you they have an obligation to fix it esp since its a safety and OHS and an obvious problem.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@outlander,the home is owned by mum through the sale of the farm.I actually just emailed the plumbers.

Long story short,dealt with these plumbers over the years,when I went to drs,my mother and I agreed to get roof done,I called in to their office whilst mum was in the car,asked the young receptionist if they could give a quote next week.I came home a bit pissed off,she was a bit intimidating and when asked who to contact she said "Contact ......(my mother)I felt intimidated and a bit disrespected.I just emailed to cancel quote don't know @outlander,there was something amiss in her delivery of customer service and I didn't appreciate how I was made to feel.I said whether I own the home or not,no reason for the lack of respect and was there to give them business.

Emailed and told them this but little Miss will get the email in the morning.The way I feel,but it wasn't a good reception.Probably should've shut up,but get furious how I can't get work yet they employ people who lack basic social skills.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Her delivery and attitude towards me I clearly got and they charge high prices,I basically got a cold judgemental reception from her coming away feeling inferior.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hmm thats a tough place to be in @Former-Member maybe itll open their eyes with your email. Maybe try to get some other quotes and match them against each other for better deals

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Don't need that @outlander,if I come away not happy I know there is something wrong.I came out that door feeling "less than",no need for it.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Morning, @catgirl, @outlander, @Bunniekins, @eth, @Former-Member, @Former-Member, @Shaz51, @CheerBear and everyone passing through this thread this morning,

Lovely cool breeze flowing through open doorways again as I write. The sky was rosy pink on waking. Currawong sounding musically in the distance, answered by single notes from other birds. They still sound sleepy, as am I.

@Former-Member, I hear you about questioning the value of deep thinking at times, though intuitively we know it is a good, or at least, natural thing for us. Another of my mother's mantras when I was a child: don't think so much. She had a point in worrying about me that way, but what can you do when born to think? It's great news that you will be going on the cruise, and especially that you are excited and looking forward to it.

@catgirl, my screening hasn't happened yet. It's on in a few weeks time. I will be there in person. Very nervous, and excited. Yesterday was a good one after a couple of down days. Saw my old support worker, who I haven't seen for eight months since we finished up. We spent two hours together, walking on the beach for most of it. She's fabulous and was so nice to catch up. I hope the days are treating you as well as possible too.

@Bunniekins, I love the story of 'the scarf, the client and the psychiatrist'. How funny that you were flicking the scarf around to see if he noticed but that you thought he might instead have thought you were being crazy, lol. So the pea has a scarf for every day of the week now, though in the same coloured wool. You make me giggle, gp. Looking forward to hearing how your first session with the new psychiatrist goes, when that comes around.

Sending love and good wishes for everyone's today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Hi Maz! I absolutely love currawongs! they have a beautful song. Magpies too.

Have a wonderful day and best wishes to @Mazarita@Former-Member@outlander@Shaz51@catgirl@eth@Former-Member!:D

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Bunniekins, you and me both with the love of currawong and magpie song. Both so musical. Also butcher birds, very musical little birds. How are you this morning?

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