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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Ahhh ... so you would need a supervised class with an instructor who knows what they are doing. Not so easy to come by. My mother is in the same boat she has problems with her leg and back and goes to the gym and hates it and does gentle exercises under a physiotherapist. There is no way I could get her into a pool she hates that although I think it would be best for her. She can no longer walk for a distance sadly.

It is very hard. She just hates how her body is giving in on her.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Have to go and gets treats for my son who will be home soon. Sorry to end our conversation on such a depressing topic ...love gp xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Another case of how we need to be as kind as possible to ourselves about what's going on with our bodies, I think, @Bunniekins. It does get trickier as we get older and the mantra of 'lose weight' conceals a lot of complex factors that might get in the way and leave us feeling bad. I don't like it but don't want to be completely miserable about it either. I refuse!

Having said that, I am actually nervous about my weight for my screening in Melbourne. Some of these people I will be having reunion with after a long time. They've only ever known me as a slim woman. Hope I don't look too awful. To combat that, I guess I'll have to make the content of my talk as interesting as I can! Not putting pressure on myself, noooooo....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Ciao for now, @Bunniekins. A bit of real world distraction might be good today. Thanks for the chat, always good, no matter how difficult the subject.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita you will be the brightest star in Melbourne!!! I love you Maz 😄 xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita @Bunniekins

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita @Bunniekins @CheerBear @outlander @Former-Member @Teej and not sure who else I should tag right now. 3 hour meeting this morning. Bombed out this afternoon. It was very intense for me and I was in tears for quite a bit of it. Will probably post about it on my other thread tomorrow. Not up to going into the details right now.

Have some music on (Talking Heads again) and am trying to pick myself up a bit. Heading out for fish and chips by the beach with bro and sil later so that should clear my head a bit. Bugger the weight issue - it's a problem for me too but I need some comfort food tonight.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry to hear how intense it was @eth. That's such a long meeting. I hope the beach feels good for you.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@eth psycho killer cest quo cest Fafafafafafaaaaaaa Runrunnnnnrunrunnnnnawaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyy!

I loved that song great band too.

Sorry NDIS was so intense for you but I kew it would be I am having one next week and I am already stressing out about it..... Enjoy the beach sounds like a really nice idea.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, thanks for giving us a brief account of it. Glad it's over for you now and you are already picking yourself up with Talking Heads and comfort food near the beach. Sending love and happy vibes.

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