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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita Hi Mazarita it's not really a strict diet it is just getting healthier I had let myself go and my body was not coping anymore because you can only get away with that when you are a youngan and I am 50 plus so I wanted to eat right drink lots of water gentle exercise and lose some weight hopefully. I think I can see it already at day 8! I certainly feel better in myself which is the main thing anyway.

My pjs are very boho rofl! have to wear a long shirt at the back though otherwise you see greenpeas undies!!

Good luck with the gym I tried last year to get back but I am just so bored of the gym I couldnt do it would prefer to go for a walk.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

That's great that you are doing that for yourself with better diet and health, @Bunniekins. I am hoping for walks and gym. I've walked a lot on the beach that is across the road from us over the years, a huge amount. Still not every day and there are even long stretches of time when I don't go out (like lately). But I always get there again in the end. Tides are wrong for my walk today. Hopefully tomorrow maybe.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Mazarita I may have just missed you. How has your day been today?

My sil rang the PHaMs provider and they've organised a new support worker to come this week - mixed feelings about that - I will get to my appointment but I've always been introduced to a new person before going out with them previously.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

I did @Bunniekins, @Mazarita but only slept for half an hour

Mr shaz asleep for 3 hours

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Shaz51 Apparently all we need is a 10 min power nap a day for the brain. So I think you did really well getting your 30 mins ... sheeesh men always sleep better than women mostly.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth, frustrating that your support worker needs to be changed. I know that interrupts the flow, though I did get going fairly quickly with the new person when that happened to me. Perhaps the new one will be better than the last, better fit with you, I hope so.

Hi @Shaz51, you are giving me ideas with your mention of a nap.

@Bunniekins, what have you been up to today?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita I have been trawling the universities re courses ... which I am finding hard as I am not sure what I want to do. I have my psychiatrists appointment this week and I cannot wait to see him and get my meds sorted better. They are just not quite right yet and if I seriously want to study I have to have that done.

Although I am not too fussed as this year was all about my son and getting him organized not about me except for my health.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

It would be great if all worked out too, @Bunniekins. Fingers crossed you get the full ensemble of plans moving forward this year. My meds are never perfect but I prefer to stay as stable with meds as possible for the most part as the changing can be so destabilising to me. But I have recently had an increase in dose of anti-depressant. It probably helped me get through the most difficult part of my friend's move out of her flat, which has been the main area of my focus really for about eight weeks. But I notice I'm still having the same old troubles getting going in my days on the whole. Drattit.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Mazarita It is all about the meds isnt it ... they just have to be right ... psychiatrist wants me to be on less and I want more. I will argue with him when I see him that I just want to be stable and not have these mood fluctuations. Getting going and doing things is hard but you are here on the boards and are a really valued member of the forums that in itself is great

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks, @Bunniekins, much appreciated. Same back atcha. I also do get my videos made and out there in the world (why I can't post them here). That's been one of the main lifelines for me over decades. Also, I have a lovely person to live with and semi-care for me in my companion (C). Some friends, my mum still alive, though at a distance. Life is pretty good except for my never ending struggles with physical energy levels, motivation for self care, and just the basic stuff that most people take for granted. And the mood shifts and never feeling relaxed really, even when I look close to catatonia in my armchair, lol. It's great we have this forum too, a great community resource that we all contribute to and hopefully benefit from.

What are you drawn to studying?

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