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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thank you so much. I also had a few wines last night. I probably wouldn't have asked if I hadn't had the liquid courage you know? But I'm glad I did. I've sort of created this isolated life for myself on purpose. I had quite the break down around may last year. (CPTSD, Atypical anorexia) Had flashbacks of my trauma. And now I don't go out very much at all except for work. I used to be really sociable but it feels very difficult "suddenly" to get out. I've cut off some people in my life, and it's getting easier to do that. But it's not always a good thing. I'm just painfully lonely. I really appreciate you guys replying. I woke up this morning with a full inbox and was like 😮 @Mazarita thanks for saying you've liked what I've written to new users. I get energy and strength from helping others with their stuff. My psychologist says it comes natural to me. Which is nice

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Leggs

@Mazarita

Its great you are getting a life outside your door. Thats a big positive shift.

Just looking at Amy W now. Not really into catastrophising about drugs and sex and the whole celeb thingy. Yes she had great contralto. The Disturbed vid was also described as operatic. We had an ex metal singer soloing. Ha ha ... not simply opposite miusical styles.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

guess there was an edit @Leggs I used to get upset when they did that to me, guess they said here are the rules etc . Anyway you'll be fine. Lots nice people here. Some work. Some study. Some garden. some just watch tv and not much else, well when not working and that was december ha and no inclination to start again in a hurry lol

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@TAB oh yeah only a slight edit. and I totally understand why, but wasn't consciously thinking about what I said! I mentioned weight loss. And that is rather triggering for some people so I totally understood and wasn't offended at all. Simple mistake 🙂 I think in the past I would have beat myself up over something like that! So hey, that's an example of progress 😉 it's really nice to chat. I haven't been on an online forum since my early 20s! (im 33) I'm a bit rusty 😅

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

yeah prob in take it out on myself mode for somethings atm seems to be a few in fifties on here including me I cant name names there are people in later 20s who get all angsty and when is my life happening Anyway you'll find your way around @Leggs

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Well it seems like you've got a few health things going on from what I've read. Pain doesnt help with the emotions we have to manage! Thank you ☺️ Starting to slowly find my way a bit.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @Leggs

Good on you for getting out to work even if isolating at home at other times. Me too with a bad breakdown last year (dramatic bipolar mood swing, very slow recovery process).

I hope you can slowly find your social vibe again as part of the recovery from your crash. Who knows, chats with people here may help with getting that ball slowly rolling again in your real world life.

A big compliment that from from your psychologist, nice! Your contributions here are already showing that. Have a good remainder of the day.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth just woke up about 45 minutes ago at 3pm. New anti-depressant seems to be complicating my sleeping again, though I haven't got to the levels of disruption there have been before. If you happen to be around and available for chat, I am here for a while.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Leggs Welcome to the forum

@Mazarita

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom

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