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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

A rest dy for me @eth Been such a full on, tiring week - need to catch up on some sleep.

Any plans for you today?

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Appleblossom good morning to you too. I've been pretty much absent the last 2 days for my mh but look forward to catching up with you again.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sounds delicious @eth

I hope you have some extra left over to share here haha 🙂

Take care of yourself my friend 🙂 I'm just headed off to get some coffee and then enjoy a quiet day

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

@Zoe7 hope you get the rest you need. I admire the way you're keeping up your efforts with school. Lucky kids xx

Haven't really got a plan but sort of a schedule I'm working on. So far it's going ok. It's fairly flexible, but one aim is to structure my time online and limit it to 2 - 3 hours at most, including SANE, inbox and fb. Have reached out to 4 friends this morning too. And shared some music. Briggs and Tim Minchin have a new track out called House Fyre - great poetry in the lyrics as always with those two. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6nZQRt4BXr8 Also listened to Jeremy Dutcher again - love his work : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HF6CfGndHH8

Plus did my banking and used the self-service option on the phone for the first time in a few years. Found out that the $750 bonus for dsp people has gone in. Have also done some writing - journalling this period of social distancing.

So I've already finished my morning list coz I was up so early. The afternoon is more of a loose list of things I can get into offline.

Lots of love xx

Special love going out to you too @outlander You're on my mind this morning xx

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Having a complete break from school work this week @eth We have worked so hard this week on getting things organised for the first few weeks so need a break from it all. I am happy to be home with my fur babies to do things for me (or not depending on how I feel).

It is great you have received your money - I don't get paid until Wednesday (sometimes it goes in Tuesday night) so I need to wait to pay some bills and then do a shop. Food and fur bay food sorted for now though so that is good.

I'll check out those links soon - I like Tim Minchin so will watch that first.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good to hear you're going to have a proper break @Zoe7 - but if I know you at all I'd guess you will still find plenty to do.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

haha @eth You know me so well lol I have some plans on things I want to do at home but there is no rush. I was worried that having a complete break would led to some of those dark thoughts and feelings re-surfacing (as often does when I do nothing) but so far all good. I know it is only day one of the holidays but I am feeling okay. I thought I would fall in a heap straight away but I haven't as yet so that is positive.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

💞 @Zoe7 enjoy a chill day at least before you throw yourself into it all!

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth I'm working on (reminding myself) something similar - some routine, without beating myself up for not accomplishing big things.

Hi @TAB

Squeaker my Cockatiel died (last night) - my only (semi-tame) bird, in many years.

He called to greet me, to get me to give him some attention.

He loved looking at my face, & following my eyes as he walked along the perch.

I will miss him terribly....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Sorry to hear that @Adge be strong

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