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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

27230 replies

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

No Soap in the Shops - so No Laughter....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning to all passing here today @Mazarita @Adge @Snowie @TAB @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Maggie @CheerBear @Zoe7 @MDT @Teej @Former-Member @frog @outlander @Shaz51 @Sans911 and anyone else who joins in here.

So sad to see some people having a very difficult time both on and off the forums at the moment. Life is very much harder in these times and naturally people's feelings are running high at times. It's so hard to interpret the written word at times, without all the other cues involved when face to face. This isn't aimed at anyone in particular, just me saying how I feel about it. It's very hard to be an observer and not get involved but it's so important not to risk escalating things for anyone. I'd really love to be able to hold out the olive branch, pour oil on the waters. I'm feeling really challenged today, having yesterday end and today start with reading alarming posts. I don't want to step away from the forums but will be monitoring my own feelings much more closely and disengaging from some threads for a bit.

I think @Former-Member s should be stepping in more or emailing those who are clearly struggling and/or at risk. I very much hope the emailing is happening behind the scenes. I am more often feeling out of my depth here.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

💐💕 @eth ....

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth

I really understand what you are saying here - I will let you know that a large part of last night's discussion seems to have been deleted

It's a hard time for everyone right now - obviously both on and off the forum - if I hadn't just taken time out to refresh myself I would have to now I think

I hope you are able to take the time to refresh yourself - I think one of the problems is that we can become drained in the forum because people are exhausted - with so much happening

And I agree we need a moderator around and interacting more. Obviously someone stepped in last night - I had read some of what took place but took time out and when I returned it had been deleted which is probably the best thing

I don't think anyone was at fault and one thing is when we are reading and writing we miss those facial and body-language cues that guide most of us through life - and another thing is we can't interupt each other - that's hard - the person writing can continue without anyone butting in to say "Hey - wait a bit - this is not quite right!"

All the bes @eth - I hope to see you soon

Dec

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Take care @eth and look after yourself today❣💝💌

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @eth
Well said my friend.
Take care please.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hey @eth definitely hear you, keen to have a convo about this further via team@saneforums.org. Have also just posted a reponse in far and away regarding the conflict over the weekend I know it must be painful to watch people you care about interacting this way.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hello friends @MDT @outlander ... everyone expressing an interest

I'm with you @eth Couldn't agree more

So many things seem are strained/heightened atm and it's reflected here.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Woo Hoo, I got Toilet Paper (for the first time in 4 weeks) & Soap!

I saw someone coming out with a packet of toilet paper (shelves always empty) - so in I went, straight up the toilet paper isle, & bought the last pack....

I'm all Good now, for the moment....

Adge

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Wahoo!!! Amazing @Adge

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