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A long rave

A long rave

Edit Feb 2018: This thread has evolved into a chat thread, which is fine by me. In addition, I encourage other members to feel free to post their own 'long raves' in here too if wished. I will continue to post my own longer raves from time to time, as well as chat with friends along the way.

Original post from May 2016:

First of all, a (very) long post alert. Please don't feel obliged to read or respond. Mainly I am writing today to clear my own head of some things. So, here goes...

Last week, I managed to get to all planned appointments and activities every day of the week except Sunday. That only amounts to one, maximum two, per day, but was an improvement on previous weeks and months. I've made all planned appointments in a week before, but there have not been so many appointments in so many days consecutively. Many of you will know that, prior to about mid last year, I spent years very rarely leaving the flat. This was since the last of my breakdowns from paid employment in 2008 (one of so many similar breakdowns from paid working, though none as devastating in consequence as this last one). With each of these breakdowns, the recovery time got longer and longer. It's taken eight years to recover much at all this time around.

This week, so far, I've made none of my appointments or activities. In fact, I've not showered for days. Embarrassing to admit but maybe helpful to own up to it. As I write I'm still in what I wore to bed, as I was all day yesterday and the day before. The weird thing is that I don't feel that bad in my emotions, just crashed out physically and lacking almost all motivation except to use the computer. In other words, my mind and fingertips are alert and active, in fact nervy and overactive as usual, but the rest of me is crashed out. Perhaps I have entered what some people call a bipolar 'mixed state'. Whatever the terminology, this is where I am and I've been here so many times before.

The way I see it, there are a number of possible reasons for the way I am after last week:

  • inner conflict about how helpful my psychologist treatment is for me (saw her on Friday);
  • trying to further reduce my tobacco intake (the struggle seems disproportionately huge and exhausting);
  • needing recovery time from a big week (by my standards);
  • simply another manifestation of bipolar disorder in me.

Regarding the psychologist. She is young compared to me and I have the feeling that she may not grasp the full extent of my situation, partly through lack of life experience. Perhaps she may particularly lack an understanding of the various physical ailments that complicate things with me, some age-related (menopause, musculo-skeletal problems), one of them a chronic illness (crohns disease). She is treating me with some techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, something I honestly have never liked the sound of when I've read about it. The main 'homework' I have for this four week period is a sheet I am meant to fill out every night covering various things including tobacco use, coffee intake, isolating, unbalance eating, sleep patterns, lack of exercise. The sheet also includes sections monitoring mood every day. The problem I find is that monitoring and (by implication) tackling all these things at once is just overwhelming. I am significantly depressed after filling out the form because it seems to highlight all the ways I am failing rather than the ways I am succeeding. The psychologist has given me this sheet as homework once before and it had the same effect on me then. A full month long slump into depression is what followed. This sheet makes me feel very pressured to recover quickly from all of these things at once, a message that contradicts the advice of my psychiatrist (who I trust much more). His advice is to take it slowly and steadily and not feel rushed. As of yesterday, I stopped using the DBT form altogether. I am even considering giving up on the therapy with this psychologist after my next (sixth) session instead of seeing it through to the ten sessions my GP is willing to refer me for.

With the difficulty of further tobacco reduction, I am succeeding in reducing this a little more but the effort is gargantuan and seems to be sapping all the strength I have for making it out the door to my activities and appointments (or even to get dressed and showered). Writing here is just about the only thing that is distracting me from smoking again or thinking about it obsessively.

I've run out of steam on writing about it all now (a huge sigh of relief from any readers at this point).

I wonder if anyone else can make any sense of this.

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In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Good morning @Mazarita @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @Bunniekins @CheerBear @Zoe7 and @octavia and anyone else around here today. I'll be over on the Saturday Soiree - all welcome!! thread if anyone wants to catch up with me.

Dear @Mazarita I really hope you choose to spend some time with us again since dipping your toes in the water yesterday. Your brave sharing about where you're at and where you've been was appreciated by many I'm sure. Some things have changed a bit while you've been away - e.g. the way thread titles can now show in the dropdown when you @. I'm sure there's more than that but can't think of it right now. The thread I mentioned above is one I started for a place for folk to hang out on a Saturday (when it's often fairly quiet around the forums). It's also quite ok to share about whatever's going on for you - a bit similar to here, anything goes (within guidelines of course). I'm really looking forward to seeing you some more. Lots of love xx

@octavia It's good to hear from you again too. Really good news that you and your husband are reclaiming your 'normal life' now that you've made the hard choices and changes with your son. Stay strong in your resolve. I hope he starts to be responsible about his issues sometime soon.

In response to: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Welcome Back my Magical Mazy ❤️

Love you @Mazarita
So, so, so, so - so, so, so, so, so very, very, very, amazingly good to hear from you

Your year sounds like it's been incredible, you've lived some life girl 😄 It's not good that you health has deterioated, but we're not spring chickens & that can happen sitting at home doing nothing.

So glad your back, no need to appologize, you don't have to give excuses - you have inspiring reasons! You've taken a risk, you've accepted a fall & you've lived your own lifetime memories!

I love you Mazy

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks again @Appleblossom for your response yesterday. As always your sharing gives me plenty of food for thought and perspective questioning (about my own that is). Hope you have a good day today.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @eth @Shaz51 @octavia @Exoplanet @Mazarita @Former-Member

feeling fragile today

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hi @Sophie1 sorry to hear that. Do you want to talk about what's going on some more?

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Thanks @eth sorry I didn't think my message posted as my screen went frozen- so I didn't check back for answers til now ...I'm ok :ok_hand: just exhausted from stressful work week and MsS being unwell this week

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Hope things improve with some r & r over the weekend @Sophie1 and that MsS (your daughter?) feels better soon.

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

ohh wow all my wonderful friends @Adge , @Mazarita , @eth , @Sophie1 , @Exoplanet , @Appleblossom , @octavia , @Bunniekins , @Angels333

hugs

we worked this morning

having dinner with 2 SIL`s and MIL tonight for mr shaz`s birthday

we weeding mum`s garden has really fallen backwards

so I had a look around for a gardener ------- ohh wow the prices -- crazy , looks like we might have to make some time for gardening ourselves

In response to: Re: A long rave

Re: A long rave

Stay cool (if possible) @eth @Shaz51 @Bunniekins & everyone.

Have a good afternoon.

Whisky invite with my back neighbour (last weekend) went very well thanks @Bunniekins I didn't let her get me too sozzled....

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